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12/31/04 - 10:56PM: About an hour 'til we say goodbye to the year that changed everything. It's already 2005 in Australia, check it out. Happy New Year to everyone! Stay tuned for a new improved jesse leo dot com -- time for a facelift in 2005, methinks :)

12/30/04 - 1:46PM: Finally, some pics from Christmas 2004! Click here.

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12/27/04 - 4:26PM: Cataclysmic... almost biblical in scope... horrible.

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12/26/04 - 8:56AM: A Merry Christmas to everyone! Two words: Christmas bliss. Pics coming soon!

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12/23/04 - 3:56PM: Just when I though I couldn't get any more hip, I've set up a GMail account! It's free, it's still in beta, it's by invite only (for now) and it has a 1GB storage limit! That's right - 1GB for free! Hit me up - jesse.leo at gmail dot com (note the period between first and last names).

2:17PM: You probably heard how Microsoft took one on the kisser this week when the European Union ruled that MS must make a Windows Media Player-less version of Windows, and must also make some of its source code available to allow some competitive development. But the damage is probably done at this point -- Windows Media Player is already installed as the default program on waaaaaaay too many computers. CNN article here.

11:49AM: As if World of Warcraft (WoW) wasn't already cool enough, a few seasonal enhancements have been made, including a special guest appearance by the big guy (see screenshot above). While in Azeroth St. Nick operates under the nom de plume Greatfather Winter. Much of WoW's gameplay consists of participating in quests to find certain items or people. Particularly brave adventurers may now quest on behalf of Greatfather Winter to find him his daily fix of milk & cookies! Also, many merchants are reportedly now selling festive items such as Greatfather's Winter ale, candy canes, gingerbread cookie recipes, wrapping paper and mistletoe. Big fun!
Here is another festive screenshot of some Christmas decor outside what appears to be a bank.

11:12AM: Attack of the killer tomatoes. Jeez.

10:32AM: The news from the doc is good -- the meniscus (cartilage under the knee, not an Olympic event) is perfectly intact. The doc, backing out the door towards the next exam room as he spoke, called it "strained ligaments" and prescribed 30 minutes per day on the stationary bike. No surgery, yay!

All things considered, this coulda been alot worse. I'm only out $30 in copayments and about a month of hoops. On the plus side I got to miss several hours of work, and I gained some satisfaction in putting my health insurance to work.

12/22/04 - 10:52AM: Well it wasn't so bad. I was mercifully only shoved up to chest-level into the noisy MRI tube. The whole thing was over surprisingly fast. But who knew it was so impossible to remain completely still? I tried all the usual Jedi mind trances, but several times I found my leg moving and my brain panicking: "Left knee tensed up a bit, should I try to release it, or would that move it more? OK, keep it where it is, DON'T MOVE... damn I think it twitched.. OK don't breathe... knee tensed up again, technician is probably getting pissed..." and so on. Definitely time to switch to decaf. But the kid said I did great, and gave me the MRI pictures to prove it. Of course as soon as I got to the car I ripped them outta the envelope, but my untrained eye could only determine two things: 1) the inside of my knee is ugly, and 2) all x-rays look alike.

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12/21/04 - 2:15PM: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince release date set for 7/16/05! Story here.

1:39PM: Knee update - MRI tonight at 9:00! I hope they don't insert me into the little coffin thing, I'll have a major panic attack. With any luck I'll be able to just stick my leg in, or better still -- simply stick out my tongue and say "aaaah."

1:24PM: I've had zero time for blogging of late, what with the holidays and a crazed work schedule and all. But I wanted to post a couple of pics from last weekend's pleasant pre-holiday gathering with the Sinacore side of the family. Aidan's first official Christmas present opening went very well - he's a natural! Other shots:

Ornament Reeeeeeeach
Dorks in Red
Most Christmassy scene ever

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12/18/04 - 9:44AM: The whining has finally paid off for Wince, I mean Vince Carter. He was traded from Toronto to New Jersey yesterday in exchange for Alonzo Mourning, Aaron Williams, Eric Williams and two future first-round draft picks. Time to get off the injured list and start producing again. I'm almost looking forward to seeing him catch those patented Jason Kidd lob passes and bring the thunder.

12/16/04 - 5:04PM: This will come in especially handy this time of year - the ever-elusive Amazon.com customer service PHONE NUMBER! Unbelievable but true, it does exist and here it is: 1-800-201-7575. That's 1-800-201-7575. One more time: 1-800-201-7575. Say goodbye to endless webpage menu after submenu on their site -- talk to a living, breathing human being! But I can't take the credit, Slate did the leg-work on this one.

3:14PM: The Firefox web browser has a huge ad in today's NY Times. Gloves are off, IE! Let's see how Redmond responds. I made the switch about two weeks ago and haven't looked back. Supposedly Firefox is closing in on 11 m-m-m-million downloads and still going strong.

1:21PM: Knee update: Doc says x-ray looks OK. But since it's so tender an MRI is being scheduled to look for cartilage damage. I'm just glad he didn't say anything with the letters "CL" in it.

10:41AM: Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water.... that's two Jaws-style maulings in one week.

9:45AM: Well at least I messed up my knee performing some valiant heroic deed and saving the day (can you smell the sarcasm?). Truthfully we were down by about 14 at the moment when I drove to the hoop, elevated, and thought: "Jeez that felt funny." It was a useless move in an un-winnable game. We would go on to lose to the Rookies by about 30 or so, the worst blowout in Deflator history. The Rookies consist of a pack of kids who zip around like waterbugs, pressuring the dribbler, forcing turnovers and fast-breaking the opponent to death.

I made an appt. for later today with Danbury Orthopedics. Hopefully it's nothing serious, but I need to find out immediately.

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12/15/04 - 3:25PM: After drooling about it all day, I ended up missing the SpikeTV "Video Game Awards" last night. But apparently I didn't miss much - word on the street is that it was borderline unwatchable. There is a discussion thread over at Slashdot ripping it to pieces. Doom3 got zilcho. This is inexcusable (granted Half-Life 2 and Halo 2 stole it's thunder a bit, but RECOGNIZE). Game of the Year went to Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas. Can't comment on that, haven't played it.

Slashdot editorial on the show here.

9:50AM: Our cat Madeline does this strange thing whenever Maria nurses Adian. She has to be a part of it somehow, so she climbs on top of Aidan, purrs like a motorboat and stares at him dreamily while he dines. It's really bizarre. My theory is that as a kitten she was pulled away from her mama too soon, and now tries to live vicariously through Aidan.

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12/14/04 - 4:01PM: A follow-up to the 12/5/04 post about lottery winnings and they misery they can bring. I'll still take that chance! But damn things must have gotten bad for this fella's wife to say she wished she had ripped up the $113M ticket...

11:50AM: War of Words. Personally I think Elton and George should settle this in a jello wrestling match.

11:21AM: Found this blog by a soldier serving in that absolutely necessary, well-thought-out, meticulously planned and soon to end war over there. It's worth a read.

10:27AM: I know you will all be watching -- 9:00 sharp!

10:03AM: Oh I am SO bidding...

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12/13/04 - 9:39AM: Had a pleasant holiday gathering with some friends on Saturday night which included Bing Crosby, a roaring fire, gift openings, a holiday feast, and even a pregnancy accouncement! Toni and Craig are 7 weeks in - congrats! One more buddy for Aidan and Olivia on the way!

This gathering is something that takes place each December. It started off years ago as the "Shitty Grinch" Party -- the idea being to watch "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" while playing Grinchopoly and drinking Peppermint Schnaaps until everyone collapsed into a snoring heap on the carpet. Ahhh, to be young... But this past Sunday morning we were up early changing diapers and bragging about having polished off an entire case of Poland Spring water. "The Grinch" never even made it onto our television, and most of us were nodding off well before 11:30PM.

We did however cook a nice dinner, and we also gave "Smoking Bishop" a try (see my 12/10 post below). STRONG! A hot Sangria-like fruity wine syrupy taste. The hairs on my chest grew with each sip. Yummy, but getting through a whole glass was no mean feat. Maybe next year we'll go easier on the Ruby Port.

Did I mention that gifts were exchanged? Santa must LOVE me, I scored big time: an entire box of raw comb honey (my all-time drug of choice) fresh out of the hive, and World of Warcraft! I can now re-live all of the Dungeons and Dragons fantasies from my youth. More -- much more -- on that later.

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12/10/04 - 12:05PM: Teaser for the new Willy Wonka movie here !

11:40AM: Three words for this fellow: 1) Anger 2) Manage 3) Ment

10:41AM: We're gonna take a stab at a traditional Dickensian drink this holiday. You're welcome to stop by for a taste. It's either going to come out disasterously awful or remarkably deeeelish. Recipe for Smoking Bishop here.

12/10/04 - 9:41AM: Top selling NBA jerseys so far this season, in order of sales:

#1 Shaq's new Miami jersey... #2 TMac's new Houston gear (my favorite)... #3 Marbury of the Knicks. How did King James fall to #4? He's wreckin' shop this season so far.

Rising star (pun intended): Dwyane Wade (currently 16th in jersey sales). Dude has more game than Parker Bros. You heard it here first.

12/9/04 - 10:08PM: This was too good to pass up. Madeline is studying feverishly.

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12/8/04 - 1:22PM: Everyone knows that sex sells. Even The Vatican seems to be catching on.

11:40AM: Wrong guy to ask - I'm not saying this is a bad thing, what I have a problem with is asking presidential consent for anything computer/web related. Anyone recall during the debates when discussing the possibility of a military draft, our president referred to rumors that had been flying around the "Internets". That's InternetS plural. Like there are many. This kind of gives the impression that Dubya has never picked up a mouse.

10:09AM: From a survey recently conducted by UK baker Warburtons as part of a promotional campaign to announce its new cheese-flavored crumpets, here is a partial list of all-time cheesiest movie lines:

#1 - Leo DiCaprio's "I'm the king of the world!" in Titanic
#2 - Patrick Swayze's "Nobody puts Baby in the corner." from Dirty Dancing
#3 - Andie MacDowell's "Is it still raining? I hadn't noticed." from Four Weddings and a Funeral
#4 - Demi Moore's "Ditto," to Patrick Swayze's "I love you." from Ghost
#5 - Val Kilmer's "You can be my wingman anytime." in Top Gun

The full list can be found here. I've got a better one from Dirty Dancing -- how about: "I don't believe you, Baby. I don't see you running up to Daddy and telling him that I'm your guy."

What's interesting is that all of these films took in huge dollars at the box office. We must really love cheese.

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12/7/04 - 6:02PM: i dont no what their talkinb about. theirs nothing rong with emails these days. ok pleez repond if you argeree with me lol.

3:57PM: "Give me the whip!"
"You give me the idol, I throw you the whip!" Can this be true????!!! Oh, please say it is so!

3:11PM: Hah! Take that Metallica, Red Hot Chili Peppers and all of you other bands who have spent the past few years whining that file sharing has tapped into your millions.

10:22AM: Amos gave everyone a bit of a scare the other night when an ear infection left him quite sick. The vet put him under, cleaned up his ear and gave him some antibiotics, and I'm told he's doing much better.

The Deflators took one on the chin last night, falling to Pippa's 58-52. Close game, very physical, with some good drama right up until the end. I was almost crippled for life when I stumbled while trying to strip the ball from a big guy as he drove to the hoop. He went up just as I went down, and he ended up landing on my shoulders/head. To onlookers it looked like an intentional "low-bridge" on my part, and the other team took issue with this and wanted me ejected from the game (a low-bridge is defined as a deliberate attempt to take out a player's legs while he is in the air, and is considered very poor form to say the least). Needless to say I'd never do that on purpose, and was sure to apologize to the fellow. But DAMN we could've won that game.

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12/5/04 - 3:50PM: Maybe we should think twice before buying that $140M Powerball ticket tomorrow. Two recent lottery winners seem to be having a tough time, to say the least. Stories here and here.

11:23AM - Ahh, that's better - nothing a few dozen ornaments, three strands of white lights (non-blinking of course), 10 candy canes and NO tinsel couldn't fix.

Attended Kent's annual tree-lighting ceremony last night, and there was holiday cheer and free cookies + hot chocloate for all. Unfortuntely we didn't learn about the freebies 'til after we had dropped $11 at the Kent Coffee House. But that aside it was a festive night, with plenty of dorky Christmasy photo-ops like this one and this one.

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12/4/04 - 10:03AM: Junk Bonds - It'll be interesting to see if Bonds' trainer will be willing to take the fall for Bonds, now that Bonds is claiming to have taken whatever substances he was given out of blind faith. Bonds claims to have been been under the impression that he was being given medication for soreness. Riiiiiight... Barry, your legacy will be forever tarnished, and should you break Hammerin' Hank's homerun record it should not stand. Hey Sammy Sosa and Mark Mcguire, have anything you care to tell us about the storied 1998 season before the media digs it up?

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12/3/04 - 4:14PM: - We're all going to die.

3:26PM - We're not messing around this year - got our Norwegian Spruce at Stew's last night, the earliest ever! Once we track down all or our decorations the fun will commence, maybe as early as tonight! 'Twill rival the Rockefeller Center tree to be sure, without the dreadful pre-lighting shows and overcrowded $5/minute ice skating rink.

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12/2/04 - 12:20PM: - Ken Jennings, the nerd who has been kicking everyone's ass at Jeopardy! to the tune of $2.5 million, finally succumbs to "Most of this firm's 70,000 seasonal white-collar employees work only four months a year." (answer, er, question: "What is H&R Block?"). He actually lost about 3 months ago, as the show is taped way in advance. I don't buy it - I think Merv Griffin is regretting the recent decision to remove the 5-game Jeopardy! winner limit, and needed to get Jennings outta there.

11:02AM: Eeeewwww, maybe the animals should have eaten her.

9:22AM: Who needs Fisher-Price? Countless hundreds have been spent on toys of every description for our little lad. But what holds his interest more than anything else? A basket full of miscellany. Every night around 6:45 or so we fill it with drink coasters, junk mail, DVD cases, small books and anything else that he can't fit in his toothy little maw. This keeps him intrigued straight through bed-time.

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12/1/04 - 9:30AM: - A kinder, gentler 'Cube... And I'm all for it. Ice Cube is slowly metamorphing into the next loveable, huggable Bill Cosby-type (minus the bad sweaters). Has anyone watched him over the years?



The ever-scowling post-NWA early 90's Ice Cube wouldn't sell out under any circumstances, and his album The Predator (which in a review by the Boston Globe was described as "...reeking with his hateful sentiments") featured lyrics such as:

From "Now I Gotta Wet'cha":

Now wet motherf*ckers are bloody,
Cuz a bullet will mold your ass like silly putty
White in the shape
A hollow point'll run up in ya like ya got weight
Comin' out'cha back, Mr. Mack
Now they got yo guts in a sack
Used to have yo crew real fat in a huddle
now you're wet in a puddle, here's the Ice Cube rebuttle:
You ain't got a chance, cuz even if my bullet just glance,
you still wet yo pants...

This was shortly after his first film, Boyz in the Hood where his character (Doughboy) enabled him to pretty much be himself. But as the 90's progressed Cube's mug was suddenly appearing in movies left and right. The trademark scowl was fading, and the roles were becoming more interesting.

Of course there were a few stinkers, as one might expect. But for every Higher Learning and I Got the Hookup there was a laugh out loud Friday or a highly watchable Three Kings. His two recent Barbershop movies are very enjoyable, and the upcoming Are We There Yet? will test his prowess in the Romantic Comedy genre. Cube can now demand big dollars for leading roles, almost on par with some of Hollywood's leading men.

So has the 9mm totin' expletive spewin' 40 oz. malt liquor drinkin' Ice Cube sold out?

No, he's grown up.

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11/30/04 - 5:45PM: - Well heck they do it to dogs at the pound, why not babies?

2:01PM - I forgot to bitch and moan about the ticket I got last week after being pulled over on I-84. Somehow the New Milford cop spotted the itsy-bitsy registration sticker on the license plate - in the dark, mind you - and stuck me with a $182 ticket for 1) driving an unregistered car and 2) failing to notify the DMV about our new address.

Betcherass we're contesting it. The car is registered under Maria's name, and the reg. expired this past September. For whatever reason we never received the little renewal bill/sticker in the mail that the DMV sends out. Cop says it's because DMV didn't know about the new address. But if that's the case, THEN HOW DID THEY GIVE MARIA HER NEW LICENSE WITH THAT VERY ADDRESS ON IT??? We may or may not have a case. When I actually visited the DMV to register, the scowling employee (they really are every bit as unpleasant as the jokes say they are) said it didn't matter. Apparently the license dept. and the registration dept. don't talk to one another.

1:11PM: Quote of the Day: LA Lakers legend and current Denver Nuggets assistant Michael Cooper during a half-time interview yesterday had this to say about the Nuggets' Earl Boykins (who on a GOOD DAY comes in around 5'5", 133 lbs): "Earl has one thing that a lot of NBA players don’t have. Heart." AMEN, Coop. Hey Vince, Latrell, Ricky, Allan, Vin and others, are you listening?

12:11PM: Duppy had his 9-month checkup this AM, and we're happy to report that everything appears to be wonderfully average. He's a tad behind schedule in the mobility department, but the doc says this isn't cause for alarm because some babies simply take longer than others. I consider it a blessing because 1) I just don't have the energy to chase him around, and 2) I can't figure out how to set up those damn stairway safety-gate contraptions.

11:14AM: As if I didn't already have a boner about the imminent release of the Lord of the Rings: ROTK Extended Edition, a brand new six minute trailer has been posted here. Oh to actually see the deleted final confrontation scene between Gandalf and The Witch King...

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11/28/04 - 3:14PM: - The Deflators picked up their second straight win yesterday, sqeaking (and I mean SQUEAKING) out a 58-57 win over Hallas Farm. Way too close for comfort, but we'll take it!

10:29AM: I secretly hope for rain on Sundays. It leaves us with no choice other than to lie around in ultra-lazy mode. We even busted out a Duraflame log :)

10:18AM: Happy belated Turkey Day to everyone. We spent the evening in Kent where Father and Patti served up a damn fine bird, along with many of the usual T-Day goodies that never go out of style: mashies, cranberry sauce, salad, a killer stuffing, sinful pies, sweet wine and frothy java. A fire crackled, A Christmas Story was on the boob tube, and pants buttons were straining mightily - a classic Thanksgiving in every way. Duppy and I wore our best sweaters and khakis. Father got plenty of quality lap-time.

Route 7 Never Looked So Good - On the way up north the rainclouds parted briefly and the sky took on a freaky reddish-gold post-nuclear blast glow. Then all of the sudden a crystal clear fairytale-style rainbow arched its way across the scene. Not too shabby.

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11/24/04 - 10:08AM: By now you must be wondering how I'm doing with Half-Life 2. So far I've l've logged around 2 hours worth of playing time, and it's completely knocked my socks off. The graphics and gameplay have surpassed - yes, surpassed those of Doom 3. Astounding, really. Gordon Freeman and I started off in City 17, which is controlled in a tight-fisted grip by the Gestapo-like Combine Soldiers. These goons can be found on every street corner and doorway keeping an eye on things, and are only too happy to use their electrified nightsticks if you stray into an unauthorized area. I learned the hard way (see this screesnshot).

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11/23/04 - 2:06PM: Frodo lives!

12:56PM: Chalk one up for Flipper!

11:16AM: This has got to stop. I just did a pun without even trying. During a serious conversation with a co-worker about IKON, the company from which we buy office equipment, the words "IKON-cur" (I meant to actually say "I concur") spewed outta my mouth. Scary part is I didn't even make a conscious effort, it just sort of hapPUNed.

10:29AM: Yesterday was our 1 year anniversary! Maria is to be commended for puttin' up with me for this long. Don't worry honey, only about 50 or so more to go ;-)
Grandma babysat Duppy and we had a lovely dinner in downtown New Milford. Cheers babe, love you madly.

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11/21/04 - 7:40PM: Some more thoughts on the Pistons/Pacers game fracas from the other night: how to keep this from happening again? No idea. But for starters, no booze allowed. You don't like it? Stay home. And the arenas will just have to sell more hats and popcorn to make up the lost revenue. Next, build some sort of tunnel for the players to use when entering and exiting the court. Sad but true, but fans cannot have that kind of access to the players. Third, hire more cops. Fourth, move those damn courtside seats back 30 feet or so.

I've also thought of a great idea for whoever plays at the Palace of Auburn Hills next, I believe Charlotte is there tonight: make a statement to the punkish Detroit fans by having each player pop open an umbrella as they walk to and from the court. How awesome would that be?

I just read that Artest is banned for the entire season. A suprisingly harsh penalty, IMHO (in my humble opinion). I stand by my initial assessment - while of course Artest, Wallace, Jackson et al should be suspended for a few games, I think the league should make it clear that the fans were responsible for the escalation of that situation. I'm reminded of an incident that happened with Charles Barkley back in the early 90's: Some drunk moron at a club started trouble with Sir Charles, provoking him to the point where blows were thrown. The guy ended up being tossed through a window. The NBA of course wanted Barkley to issue a role model-esque apology, but Chuck was having none of that. He deadpanned the camera and said simply "If you mess with me I WILL whup your ass." Amen. Just because someone elects to become a professional athlete does not give the public the right to harass them. Or drench them with beer, for that matter.

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The EA Games thing (scroll down to my 11/11 post) has gotten the notice of the NY Times, click here. The article even goes so far as to call the programmers "galley slaves." Delicious!

Another Times article on page 1 today talks about the imminent (1/26/05 at 2:01AM, to be exact -- what's the deal with that strange execution time, why not high noon like in the old movies?) Connecticut execution of Michael Ross. This is to be the first execution since 1963 in the normally death penalty-opposed NorthEast. Personally, I'm for the death penalty in certain situations where it is warranted. That's not to say I want 'em lined up and zapped George-Bush-as-Texas-Governor style. But here is a fellow who confessed to the brutal strangling of six teenage girls and two women back in 1984. He also raped and attacked others. My question is -- WHY HAS THIS TAKEN SO LONG? WHY HAS MONEY BEEN COMING OUT OF OUR PAYCHECKS ALL THESE YEARS TO PAY FOR THIS PERSON'S MEALS? Bye bye. Time to go.

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11/20/04 - 11:24AM: BasketBrawl - Don't try blaming the big brawl on Artest, crazy though he is (in a Rodman-esque sort of way). While lying on the scorer's table, he was pelted in the face with a cup full of Budweiser. Sorry, but the Ghandi crap doesn't work here -- it's on at that point, and that fan got what he deserved when Artest scrambled into the seats and throttled him. What ensued after that is deplorable -- fans throwing sucker punches from behind at players, chucking metal chairs, hurling bottles and ice onto the court, completely dousing the Pacers with soda as they left the stadium... bunch of idiots. THEY ARE TO BLAME - PERIOD. The sad thing is that several of them are no doubt going to cash in off this incident, especially the dude that was absolutely clocked by Jermaine O'neal (make sure you check that one out on SportsCenter, it was a great shot). Interestingly, if you visit nba.com the whole affair only got a small blurb. Hmmm...

For years the NBA has always been able to thumb its nose at the thuggery that happens every night at NHL games. Well, those days are over. It'll be interesting to see what happens. If David Stern has any cajones at all he will simply do nothing other than suspend Ben Wallace, since Wallace's over-reaction to an Artest foul is what started the melee in the first place. The Detroit police should handle the rest --review the tape and start arresting fans.

Last Night's Deflators game went a little better, we actually won pretty easily and brought our record to 1-1.

11/19/04 - 11:04AM: This is the funniest thing I've seen in a long time (page may take a while to load, but it's worth it). First, check out Cameron using the Charlie's Angels skills to snatch that camera. And then check out big bad Justin, SO intimidating at 87 lbs. Get OVER yourself, buddy. Everyone saw that episode of Punk'd when you called mommy cryin' like a lil beeyatch cuz you thought your stuff was being repo'd.

9:44AM: Almost feel bad for the guy... Almost. But enough is enough already, he clearly needs help.

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11/18/04 - 7:30PM: Grant Hill's fairytale comeback is going well -- almost too well. After spending the past 4 seasons failing over and over at NBA comebacks that his busted-up ankle refuses to allow, he's having a spectacular season. Wednesday night he dropped 32 against Utah, and seemed very much like his old self. But watching him zig, zag, sprint and leap around on that busted wheel makes me wince. Can't help but think it's a time bomb waiting to go off again at any moment... Hope I'm wrong. More here.

1:52PM: Apple is shaking in its boots, I'm sure, after the announcement that Creative Labs is going all-out to overtake the iPod in the mp3 player market. HAH! Maybe Creative should take the $100 million they're using for marketing and channel it towards producing a product that doesn't suck.

10:29AM: Thank you Marion for sending this cool photograph, taken in May 1991 at the Sunset Drive house. This pic is awesome not just because it features two recently departed late-great members of the Morris clan (both looking very svelte I might add), but it also includes: 1) Tess, who was cute as hell at that age (and still cute now of course!), 2) My very well-muscled leg (far right), and 3) the sage reflection of Franklyn - look carefully in the window behind Uncle Admiral's head!

11/17/04 - 11:42AM: The Big O: No, no THAT Big O, you perverts. Got to meet Mary + Jeremy's brand new baby girl recently, SUCH a friggin' cutie. And a healthy set o' pipes on that one, Olivia lets it be known on NO uncertain terms when her needs are not being met. Duppy is still considering her as potential girlfriend material 16 years from now.

10:29AM: Big row about the marine who allegedly shot an unarmed wounded Iraqi prisoner recently inside a Fallujah mosque. Don't get me wrong, this is horrible and needs to be investigated. But damn, why do we hear so little about the numerous booby-traps and bomb-wired corpses that the Marines come across almost every day over there? A lot of soldiers have become a statistic by giving the benefit of the doubt.

11/16/04 - 10:10AM: Half Life 2 has been officially released today after 5 years of development, countless delays, a huge chunk of stolen source code, a deadline that was missed by a full year and ongoing legal battles between the game developers and the publisher. I know I said the same thing about Doom 3, but this IS the big one. A widely popular gaming magazine has already called it "...quite simply the best video game ever made." It's predecessor, Half Life, more or less reinvented the first-person shooter genre. Counter-Strike, the most popular online game in existence is an off-shoot of Half Life. A full review (all 9's and 10's across the board) can be found here and here. Of course I'll have my thoughts posted after a few days (and loooooooooong nights) of hardcore gaming.

11/15/04 - 10:14AM: Ol' Dirty Bastard Dies - Lotsa folks couldn't stand more than 10 seconds of any Wu Tang Clan or O.D.B jam. But give credit where it's due - along with the RZA, the Genious and Method Man, the Wu Tang Clan gave a much-needed shot in the arm to the Snoop/Dre dominated 90's rap music scene. Sometimes interlacing old Sunday morning Kung Fu Theater soundbytes into rambunctious tracks, they yelled, they sang, they cursed, and they made rap music fun again. O.D.B. (aka Ol' Dirty Bastard, aka Russel Jones) also had a brief but lucrative solo career, but unfortunately spend most of it running from the law. Full story on his untimely demise here.

11/12/04 - 4:40PM: Petersen is guilty. Jeez, ya think? His wife's DNA is found in the boat, he was caught heading for Mexico with a dyed hairdo and thousands in cash on his person. It took them THIS long to figure this out?

3:29PM: Had a few minutes to kill at lunch today so I stopped by the new Apple Store. Decided to check my email on the 30-inch Apple Studio Display they have set up. Just for a goof I expanded the browser window to cover the entire screen, and it was absolutely fantastic -- to read an email message I had to actually move my head back and forth as if watching a tennis match. SIGH, someday...

12:31PM: This is getting juicy. Yesterday I had posted about the EA Games exposé revealing how they work their game programmers to death. Today an ex-employee has boldly come forward, using his real name and everything, telling his morbid tale on board the EA Express to Hell. Even better, a classaction lawsuit is now in the works against EA Games. Sic Sempris Tyrannis! This whole thing reminds me of a company I used to work for...

11/11/04 - 5:14PM: Fired up about the Fox - Nnnnnnnnnnnice to see Mozilla's FireFox gaining so much momentum in the browser world. I've been recommending this lil' gem to just about anyone & everyone with a Windoze computer that is riddled to death with adware/spyware/malware/viruses/Trojan Horses. That is, just about everyone with a Windoze computer. Most of the crap that sneaks onto your computer gets there via Microsoft's Internet Explorer browser and its colander-like security. Do yourself and favor and at least give the Fox a shot. Me, I haven't yet found a compelling reason to switch from Safari, though FireFox's cool little dragon guy is tempting.

4:17PM: Less than stellar start for the Deflators 2004-05 season. We're off to an 0-1 start after last night's 58-52 debacle. Actually it wasn't that bad. We came out rusty -- turning the ball over, missing open shots, etc. But in the second half we were able to narrow a 15 point deficit to 4. Alas, the good run didn't last :(

12:17PM: No wonder they're able to crank out such unbelievably great games, EA Games runs the equivalent of a slave ship (click here to read the story of an "EA widow"). Sad thing is, there is no solution in sight. Their games are always going to sell, they're simply THAT good. These programmers could quit, of course, but chances are there are 250 eager geeks waiting to take their place.

10:20AM: The Denver Post-News has posted an obit for Uncle Admiral, click here.

9:44AM: Aidan received his first ever haircut yesterday, compliments of his Aunt Kasey. I guess I should face the harsh reality that no son of mine will ever have dreadlocks :-(

11/10/04 - 6:44PM: Guest blogger Blaine has an important message for the airlines: SUCK LESS. Read on...

12:32PM: Read someplace that Halo 2, which was released yesterday, sold like hotcakes. In fact one reseller reported selling something like 5,000 copies in 11 minutes. Sheesh. I don't mind waiting 'til Christmas for my copy (hint hint).

9:55AM: The I'm sorry everybody site has been getting slammed with submissions. Sent mine in last night, click here. Wonder if Trader Joe's is going to slap me with a cease and desist order or something. Take a few minutes to browse through some of the galleries, they're hysterical. And of course make sure you send a submission.

The Deflators kick off their ill-fated 2004-05 season tonight at the War Memorial, details and the full schedule 2b posted ASAP. The team we face on opening night has eviscerated us the past 11 out of 12 times we've played...

11/8/04, 5:47PM - This is a bummer. We don't have HBO but we've been watching the DVDs. The show is a breath of fresh (though dead) air. How has it never won anything?

5:17PM - Why isn't this making it into the mainstream media? Or this? Or this? Or this? Or this? I don't expect the results to change or anything, and wouldn't really want them to at this point. But damn...

3:57PM - Eyore is alive and well, thank you very much: Somehow this world famous picture of yours truly petting (certainly NOT KILLING) a cute little sleepy donkey on St. John has wound up on some teenie-bopper's website! Scroll down a ways to the bottom, past the photos of the oh my god, soooo cute guys at the prom, to just under Moon River (which is actually pretty funny). There I am, with the heading of "He Killed Eyore". AAAAAHHHHH!!!! I'm calling my lawyer!

11:15AM: Name that tune -- SOMEONE PLEASE! Speakers up, please watch the trailer for this movie (Quicktime required). About halfway through, right about when Jude is making out with Julia, you'll hear a snippet of the soundtrack -- a woman's vocals. Kinda somber, kinda sultry, very smokey lounge-singeresque. Before I bash my head against the desk anymore, will someone PLEASE tell me what singer/band/song that is? It's at the tip of my brain but I can't place it, and I'm quickly losing my sanity trying to figure out who it is. Tried Amazon, but the soundtrack hasn't been released yet.

As for the movie itself, can't tell if it'll be worth a damn or not. But any flick with Natalie Portman playing a stripper has got to be worth the price of admission, not to mention two of Hollywood's hunkiest hunks in Jude Law and Clive Owen.

11/7/04, 10:39AM: Birthday Queen - She turns 29 today, and is every bit as gorgeous as the day I met her. My plans for breakfast in bed didn't quite work out (screaming teether kept us up much of the night), but there's still time to redeem myself :)

Happy B-Day babe, Duppy and I love you.

11/5/04, 5:23PM: Waterless Boy - It hit me as I was driving to work this morning licking my cracked lips, JONESING for a Sprite or something: I spent most of my childhood dehydrated, and my grade school teachers are largely to blame.

Don't get me wrong -- they're all wonderful people, some of them friends of the family. And the fact that I can remember their names 25 years later tells you the effect they had on me.

But in their zeal to maintain order in the "return from recess" lines, stops at the water fountain were limited to about four seconds per student (roughtly 3-4 gulps). Keep in mind that every recess for me at that age was a decathlon of sorts; I ran. I jumped. I threw. I dodged. I kicked. I hit. I ran some more. I swung. I grappled. I lunged. A dangerous amount of sweating was done most of those days.

Requesting water at any point other than the "scheduled drinking times" (e.g. when the class as a whole was in transit someplace) was like Oliver Twist asking more gruel. Such requests were rarely granted.

Hey they were just doing their jobs. So don't worry Mr. Z, Mr. H, Mr. S., Mrs. R., Mrs. T, et al (names witheld to protect the not-so-innocent), I don't hold you responsible.

4:18PM: Whoopsie. Call me crazy but dontcha think this warrants a closer peek at some other units for some other possible "glitches?"

3:28PM: An apology from 1/2 of the US to the rest of the world is too goddamn funny. Hell I may even send an apology. But it won't be as good as the panda bears.

9:24AM: I'm done. Not gonna bitch 'bout the election anymore. Done. It's over. I'm just gonna sit back and watch with a I-Can't-Take-My-Eyes-Off-This-Highway-Car-Wreck fascination as the crap hits the fan. And I'm not gonna smear Dubya anymore...

Alright who am I kidding?

All this hubbub has kept me from thinking about what's REALLY important -- the NBA season is underway! At last, a reason to watch SportsCenter again. I haven't really been able to watch enough so far to make any bold predictions. But it's pretty obvious that The Daddy is going to have fun beating up the other "centers" in the East (now that he plays for Miami). Detroit looks solid as they did last year. San Antonio as well. It's gonna be a fun year. Alright I changed my mind - I WILL make a prediction: Spurs will beat Detroit in the 2005 Finals. You heard it here first.


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11/4/04, 4:04PM: Failed to include another important factor in yesterday's rambling analysis of the election results: the Holy Roller contingent. You know, the people who will corner you at a party and preach the gospel for 45 minutes? Well, there are lots of 'em around this nation of ours, and they turned out in droves Tuesday night. Salon had this to say:

"The evangelical churches became instruments of political organization. Ideology was enforced as theology, turning nonconformity into sin, and the faithful, following voter guides with biblical literalism, were shepherded to the polls as though to the rapture. White Protestants, especially in the South, especially married men, gave their souls and votes for flag and cross."

Sniffing an opportunity to permanently smoosh any prospect of gay marriage ever becoming legal, they lined up to be heard on 11/2. And it was a huge factor.

9:30AM -Speaks volumes without saying a word... silent.. dark... beautiful... tragic... A lot like the Vietnam Memorial in DC. Had to know Moore would have something to say about the election results.

11/3/04, 2:03PM - God Help Us: I resisted the urge to start flaming every Bush voter and cursing left and right. I was originally going to plunk a GIANT headline across the top of the site reading:

"Congratulations voters! You've completely alienated yourselves from all of your former allies and friends and earned the distrust and emnity of the rest of the planet. What are you going to do now?"

Then I was going to sit back and watch my email inbox for an influx of messages reading: "We're going to Disney Land!"

I also flirted with the idea of an even nastier headline targeted towards the nine out of ten 18-24 year-olds (the MTV generation, that whole P-Diddy "Vote or Die" demographic) who opted not to vote last night (stats according to NPR):

"Thanks for showing up last night, kids! Have fun in Fallujah."

But no. I took a few deep breaths and got to work on some other things, and have since been able to gather my thoughts on the events of the past 24 hours.

So what happened?

How could the Dems blow it when they had all of these things going for them:
-- a president responsible for a fictitious war with no exit strategy;
-- an administration where there have been millions of lost jobs;
-- a president who speaks like a moron;
-- an administration during which a surplus has been converted into a massive deficit;
-- a riled-up base who felt the '00 election was swindled away from them;
-- huge healthcare cost increases;

Beavis and Butthead should have been able to win this thing!

I have a theory: K.I.S.S. (keep it simple stupid). How to say this w/o sounding elitist or being insulting? Here goes - we are a nation of simpletons, and Bush projects himself as a simple man. There, I said it. The simple message will win every time. No one has time to think or interpret. J'ever notice how Bush gives essentially the same speech every time? How about his answers during the debates? Short, deliberate, in lay terms, and delivered with his "aw shucks" everyman demeanor. Kerry's replies were usually a well-written novel; America is books on tape. Kerry rarely showed any faults -- America is full of 'em. Which is why when Bush screws up, he is forgiven -- no doubt on the assumption that his heart is in the right place.

The southern states and middle America were sold on the boyish grin, along with the pledge to get those bad guys with Jesus as the copilot. Moreover, they're sold on his word -- facts be damned. Info to the contrary is rejected. Here are some alarming stats on Bush backers, recently compiled by Kos and the Inter Press Service:

75% believe Iraq was providing substantial support to al Qaeda
72% believe Iraq had WMD or a program to develop them
57% believe that the majority of people in the world would prefer to see Bush reelected
20% believe Iraq was directly involved in 9/11

Bush backers, according to the survey, seem to disregard new information.

It could be a long four years. Is there a silver lining to be found? Four more years of Bushisms, for starters. And I still haven't ruled out the possibility of some sort of reality show on the First Daughters. But Dan Gillmore's blog paints a much more realistic (and depressing) picture of what may come. I hope he's wrong.

For better or worse, it's on Dubya now. But remember folks: Nixon got two terms also.

11:59AM - It's official, click here.

8:49AM - No tricks, no gimmicks... More people voted for Bush than Kerry. Period. There is still the matter of the provisional ballots being counted in OH, but I've read that it is mathematically impossible for those to make the difference. Still gathering my thoughts on this one...

11/2/04, 3:35PM - Even More Filth: Atrios reports that in some swing states automated "RoboCalls" are being placed hinting that the Democrats are planning to reinstate the draft. Below is the text of the call:

"The draft. The Democrats haven't pledged a thing. What are the Democrats hiding? Is the draft really their secret plan? Only the Democrats have proposed the possibility of a draft in this campaign. On Election Day vote Republican and say no to the draft. Paid for by the Republican National Committee. Not authorized by any candidate or candidate committee. On the web at www.gop.com."

Truly deplorable.

11:00AM - Update: the BS has started already. By now you've no doubt heard about some of the tactics the GOP is using to gain an edge: bogus phone calls to voters announcing false 11th hour changes in voting locations, intimidation techniques and Republican-hired goon squads who will appear at voting locations in many battleground states to challenge voters by demanding to see ID, and generally slowing down the entire voting process (examples, click here, here and here). But in South Dakota they're going so far as to record the license plate numbers of Native Americans who show up to vote. Pathetic.

9:05AM - Today's the day, do what ya gotta do people! All the speeches, debates, smear ads, rhetoric -- it all comes down to what happens today. I'm going to make a bold prediction on the outcome: it will be close ;-)

I DO predict that we won't know who the president is tomorrow. If the numbers are even remotely close there will be litigation and recounts and nastiness going on for weeks to come. It may get even uglier than it did in '00.

Maria and I did our civic duty this AM, and I feel strangely patriotic. Granted CT isn't one of the "battleground states," but it felt pretty good nonetheless.

There are strong arguments to be made against voting more or less AGAINST a candidate rather than FOR a candidate, as many are doing this year. These arguments are not without merit. Is Kerry the best candidate in the world? Of course not. But let's face it, can things get much worse? The stakes are too high this time around. The bullshit -- and the bodies -- are piling up too high. A tidy surplus has become a monster deficit. Gobs of folks have lost their jobs. This nation is more divided than ever. Other nations won't even talk to us. Time for a change. And should Kerry win his every move will be under a microscope -- he won't have any choice but to make good on his promises. At least I hope so...

                                             

11/1/04 - Ya know, as the election draws neared there has been so much nasty, deplorable Bush smearing going on all around the web........................................................................................... AND HERE'S SOME MORE :-)

Take a look at this ad "Whatever it Takes" above. Note the circles, and look closely. See it? A LOUSY job of the ol' Adobe Photoshop Clone Stamp tool -- the same cluster of soldiers over and over. So THAT'S where all those supporters come from. But after peering at the ad for a while, it suddenly came to me how much it reminded me of Star Wars Episode II, 'Attack of the Clones'. Very scary.

But wait, there's more. If you plan on attending a Bush rally anywhere, just make sure you memorize the Bush Pledge. I'm not making this up. Note that this is in addition to being required to sign a loyalty oath. For your pledging convenience I'll paste the pledge below. Hands across your hearts, mindless minions:

"I care about freedom and liberty. I care about my family. I care about my country. Because I care, I promise to work hard to re-elect, re-elect George W. Bush as president of the United States."

BUT WAIT, THERE'S STILL MORE: a recent article has surfaced indicating that Dubya's Iraq ambitions were in motion long before 9/11/01 (not that 9/11 and Iraq are related in any way, but I digress). To quote a chunk of the article:

“He was thinking about invading Iraq in 1999,” said author and journalist Mickey Herskowitz. “It was on his mind. He said to me: ‘One of the keys to being seen as a great leader is to be seen as a commander-in-chief.’ And he said, ‘My father had all this political capital built up when he drove the Iraqis out of Kuwait and he wasted it.’ He said, ‘If I have a chance to invade….if I had that much capital, I’m not going to waste it. I’m going to get everything passed that I want to get passed and I’m going to have a successful presidency.”

Speaks for itself. Sounds far-fetched, but keep in mind that Herskowitz is a Houston Chronicle writer and a friend of the Bush family who was asked by George H. to write the biography of his father, Prescott Bush.

10/31/04 - Happy belated Halloween to everyone. We made the rounds around our condos and gave out candy. Low key, but nice. Can't wait til Duppy is old enough to go trick-or-treating in earnest, we will CLEAN UP! Halloween will always be the ultimate kid holiday, big fun. Click here for an unbelievably cute Halloween pic.

10/30/04 - This morning was the grand opening of the Danbury Fair Mall Apple Store! Of course I was part of an early-bird queue that stretched about 150 yards across the mall, anxiously awaiting the doors to open. It was very much like the scene in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory when the crowd gathered outside Wonka's factory to be the first to get a peek of the mysteries within -- the throng nearest the brushed steel-framed doors huddled close, everyone craning their necks for a better view and no one daring to breathe. And it was oh so worth the wait, and not just for the free tee shirt. When it comes to retail stores, Apple just seems to get it. The stores are so elegant and simple, with amazing gadgets to play with every place you look. The highlight had to be the dual G5 tower set up with the 22" cinema display -- simply breathtaking, and I had to pry myself away.
If Dell or HP opened a retail store in a mall would a mob line up 1 1/2 hours before the opening? Naaaaahhhh...

10/29/04 - Don't know about anyone else but I could sure use some good news around here... AND HERE SHE IS! Olivia Carmen Walsh was born today - 7lbs, 9oz. Both she and mom are doing well. Congrats to Mary and Jeremy!

Been blowing the dust off tons of great old photos of The Admiral, I'll be scanning/posting as fast as I can. No word yet on the exact arrangements or services, though according to Pete's son Ryan his dad's wish was to have his ashes sprinkled over "The Gut" (the best fishing hole on Martha's Vinyard that you've never heard of). I think this would be absolutely perfect.

10/28/04 - Still reeling... Uncle Pete died during emergency surgery, I believe, to treat something called Disseminated Intravascular Coagulation. Been combing the web looking for an article that puts this condition in lay terms, but still don't have a clear idea of what it is and exactly how it came about.

Pete paid us a visit a few months ago and got to check out the condo and meet Aidan. If there's one thing to be learned from the whole thing, it comes down to the old cliché: give the people in your life a squeeze whenever the opportunity presents itself; you don't expect to never see them again.

My favorite Uncle Pete memory? I can think of loads of 'em from Martha's Vineyard -- telling dirty jokes on the beach, sharing belly laughs at the dinner table, or knocking over furniture having pretend fist fights. But the best had to be chasing him and his cowboy hat around Colorado's Mary Jane back around 1989. His old-school outfit, ski gear and ski style was a tribute to the days when people skied simply because it brought them joy. The sun was shining and the conditions were epic.

10/27/04 - My uncle Peter Morris passed away earlier this week. More to follow...

10/25/04 - Had a blast writing this letter to the Danbury Tax Collection office over the weekend. I always bitch and moan about my car taxes, and always pay them late. But this time I had a legitimate beef... sort of:

[Name Removed for Privacy Purposes]
City of Danbury Tax Collector
155 Deer Hill Avenue
Danbury, CT 06810
RE: Acct. ID XXXXXXXXXXXX

Dear XXXXXXXXXX,

The purpose of this note is twofold: first and foremost, to settle up back-taxes owed for my wife’s vehicle (List #:XXXXXXX-XX). Second, to express my severe dissatisfaction with the $16.12 interest we allegedly owe the city.

Please note that the amount of the enclosed Money Order does in fact include this charge, as it is in my best interest to put closure on this issue and move on. But the charge was not warranted. You see, the reason the tax payment became delinquent is because the bill did not arrive until AFTER its due date. I ask how is it possible to make a timely payment under these circumstances? The bill was addressed to a place we have never lived, a 198 Southern Boulevard. And while we did at one time in fact reside at 198 1/2 Southern Boulevard, we have since relocated TWICE, in both instances taking all of the necessary steps to register our new address.

Interestingly, no other entity with which we have regular correspondence had any problems getting their mail to us. No bank statements were lost, no bills were misdirected, no magazine subscription issues went missing. The City of Danbury, it seems, is the only institution that does not bother to keep updated records. And for this reason my wife and I are out $16.12.

A phone call to the Tax Collector’s office did not help. The clerk who fielded the call essentially told me “Too bad”. This, coupled with the oppressive nature of the letter we received (threats to collect our taxable goods, pinch funds from my paycheck, etc), left me feeling very menaced. This “payup and shut up” attitude has me half-expecting some muscle-bound “collection specialists” to kick down my door and start removing furniture.

This is not an attempt to collect the $16.12; in the grand scheme of things it’s not a staggering amount. But this question needs to be asked – is there no outlet or recourse for a taxpayer who feels that the city has erred? If so, what are the steps involved?

Yours in grim compliance,

Jesse Leo


Lip Synching Louse - Anyone catch SNL over the weekend? Didn't think so. Does anyone watch it anymore? Anyway, the Music Gods took their revenge on one of the numerous talentless goofballs appearing all over the charts these days. In the middle of her second gig of the night, some sort of production error revealed Ashlee Simpson to be completely lip-synching to a different song than the one that was actually playing. Apparently she awkwardly danced around for a while, and then hustled off-stage. She later apologized and blamed the error on the band.

10/22/04 - Of course the big fear all along has been that there would be some sort of terrorist activity sometime in October/November to disrupt the election process. So why then has our National Security Advisor left her post and gone on the campaign trail giving speeches at Bush rallies?

Screw you Verizon. How is it that my monthly bill is always around $50, yet during the average month my cell phone is on for a total of 15 minutes?

Speakers up! Another Daily Show gem.

Damn, they missed Coulter's face. Most memorable Coulter quote: Kerry as president would be good for the "bodybag industry."

Aidan picked out his pumpkin but later had to put it back since it was bigger than him (see photo above)!

This ad is beautiful in its terrible simplicity. That little wisecrack was a major faux pas by him. But at least it got a few guffaws from the tuxedo clad audience that night.

10/21/04 - I'm Published, Part 2: Frequent jesseleo.com'ers may recall that my 4/03 submission to the Poop Report movie archive was posted for the world to see (click here and scroll way down to "GoldenEye", submitted under my alter-ego "Dean"). It was my proudest moment. But during the past three months I've also had letters posted in both MacWorld and MacAddict, two HIGHLY respected technical publications. Alas, the two 'zines don't post the letters online. But of course I've saved both issues for all those who are interested. The road to fame, it seems, is paved with poop. And Macs.
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Despite nationwide shortages of the vaccine, the VP manages to get HIS flu-shot.
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What would Babe Ruth say if he was alive today? Probably something like "Help! Let me out of this coffin!" or maybe "Jeez it's dark in this coffin!" Or even more likely he'd say "DAMN, the 2004 Yankees are a sorry lot!" How do you take a 3-0 lead in the series and then drop four straight games? I don't care much for baseball, but it would be nice to see the Sox, er, SAWKS go all the way. Bet they were gettin' "WICKED F*CKIN' HAMMID" last night in Southie.
But don't shed any tears for the Yankees. Be reminded that when the sweat dries, they're still multi-millionaires who make a living playing their favorite game.
Oh and a note to Pedro: It's over. Retire, please. Pitching machines at the local batting cage are harder to hit than you.

10/20/04 - At long last, the mystery behind the "Bush-bulge" is revealed! And this officially gets Bush off the hook - click here (thanks Happy Go Larry).

Apparently ABC's legendary Peter Jennings missed day 1 of Journalism 101: "I'm a little concerned about this notion everybody wants us to be objective." Article here.

Campaign update: On the same day Dubya accuses Kerry of using military draft 'scare tactics' to persuade voters, Cheney warns that a vote for Kerry will get us nuked.

S'cuse me while I whip this out... One more reason he'll get my vote: Kerry can grasp objects such as microphones with his wanker, freeing up his hands to emphasize his speaking points (photo here).

10/19/04 - The cool invention pictured here enables Aidan to be propped up while bathing, which makes the entire process far less traumatic for all involved. Although Aidan has promised us that he will be sitting up on his own any day now, that thing allows us to take our eyes off him for a second without fearing he will slip beneath the suds and die a horrible watery death. Plus it frees up a hand to allow the bather to photograph the bathee without dropping the trusty digital camera into the suds, sending IT to its horrible watery death.

10/18/04 - The article by Ron Suskind in yesterday's NY Times Magazine officially creeped me out. It reveals a side of Dubya that so far we've only heard hints of here and there -- the religious zealot. Suskind interviewed senior officials, political analysts and senators, and they all seem to agree that A GREAT DEAL of the president's decisions come directly from the Almighty; much of this presidency is "faith-based." When faced with an important decision the president will, rather than analyze facts and waste time studying the details, take his direction from above and stick by it at all costs. How can his decisions be wrong if they came from God? Hoooooo boy.

10/17/04 - Having his say - Guest blogger Blaine Dulin (who happens to be my cousin) shares his thoughts on how The Matrix has triggered the downfall of modern action films. While I personally refuse to dis The Matrix in any capacity, he does raise a valid point... Click here. And check back periodically for follow-up Blaine postings.

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Ahhhhhhhh. All in all, a good day. Maria and Aidan were attending Mary Walsh's baby shower, so it was just me, the NY Times, a fresh-outta-the-dryer pair o' sweats, and Spansh coffee. Not too shabby. What could make this almost perfect day even better? The announcement of the LOTR: ROTK Special Edition boxed set, scheduled to ship mid-December! W00t!

10/16/04 - Uber-pissed - A copy of Halo 2, the most widely anticipated XBox game ever, has somehow been leaked onto the internet a month ahead of the release date. And Bungie is PISSED. Check out what they had to say.

10/15/04 - Letterman ran another zinger the other night, click here. What's up with those eyes?

Oops She Did It Again - And while we're on the subject of the 80's movement (see below), has anyone heard Britney's remake of the Bobby Brown hit "My Prerogative"? I hear it about six times a day on the insipid radio station I'm forced to listen to at work all day. It's almost unlistenable. How could she tarnish that priceless jam from 1988-89 like that? The fond memories of trying out the latest moves in the Danbury High School Student Center always came rushing back whenever I heard those infectious beats... and now it's ruined forever. What's worse, Britney doesn't even try to sing anymore. On all of her recent hits her voice is "digitized" in some strange way. And all live performances are blatantly lip-synched. Seems as long as she shakes that booty the masses will remain entranced.

Huge news for Miami Vice fans, as the VH1-inspired "I love the 80's" movement continues. According to the Gothamist, Universal Studios has announced plans to make a movie based on the hit 80's series. Colin Farrell and Jamie Fox will play Crockett and Tubbs.

Rumor has it that there is already a Dukes of Hazzard flick being shot, with Jessica Simpson playing Daisy Duke (yum!). There are also plans to bring the A-Team to the big screen (which apparently will NOT include Mr. T, tragically). This is all well and good, but I won't rest until a Magnum P.I. movie is announced. Someone out there, PLEASE MAKE IT HAPPEN!

10/14/04 - Apple of my eye - Nnnnnnnnnnnice!

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Why did they spend so much time talking about flu shots? No questions were asked about a presidential plan to deal with obesity. More than half of America is overweight, and hundreds of thousands of Americans die each year due to obesity-related issues (can you tell that we recently rented "Super-Size Me?). To me this is a much... weightier issue than flu shots (sorry, couldn't resist).

The Battle of the Bulge continues - This photo was posted by Salon earlier today. What the heck IS that thing? This time around it looks like Limulus polyphemus scuttled up the back of his suit jacket.

Round 3 goes to the Senator, but not by much. They touched on abortion, education, unemployment, health care and faith. Personally I think the president should not have been allowed to continue because of the frothy wad of saliva that formed near the left corner of his mouth early on. Get that man a glass of water! Both candidates did their share of question dodging, with Kerry talking around Social Security and the president somehow warping a question about unemployment into education - he said he would tell someone who lost his job to take some money and go to community college. Say whaaa???

On style points Kerry won easily. Once again the president seemed to be putting forth a Herculean effort to not scowl. His awkwardly unconvincing grin was uncomfortable to watch. And then there was that bizarre exclamation - Kerry said that two leading news networks indicated the president's assesment of Kerry's health care plan were not accurate, and the president came back with: "I'm not so sure it's credible to quote leading news organizations about—oh, never mind." Huh?

The fact checkers were on the scene as well -- a couple of statements that stand out: Kerry accused the prez of never having met with the Congressional Black Caucus, which was not true.
Bush at one point denied having said he wasn't concerned about finding bin Laden. But of course this famous 2002 video clip has been playing all over the web (thanks Atrios).

I plan to vote for Kerry, but I will say this -- the president's daughters are hot.
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10/13/04 - Tools O' The Trade - He's doing much better, thank you to everyone for their various suggestions on how to deal with baby colds/snuffling. What seems to have done the trick is the Vick's vaporizer in his room. You plug it in and it emits just the right amount of that stuff into the air for about 6 hours. Plus it has a built-in nightlight!

Don't forget to watch the third and final debate tonight (even if it means missing some of the Yankees/Sox game). Expect the gloves to REALLY come off, and Dubya to use his new "Kerry can run [from his record] but can't hide" catch-phrase all night. Funny, that's what HE said about bin Laden... Oh yeah, and don't forget to look for the mystery device between those shoulder blades!

If only the networks would air this ad right after the debates.

10/11/04 - He cried. All weekend. Non-stop. Woke up hourly. Seldom napped. Is it the teething? His stuffy nose? His general displeasure about the state of the world? No drugs, and no amount of holding, snuggling, playing, patting, caressing, smooching, embracing, pacing, strolling, whispering, praying or rocking can soothe him when he's like this. Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelllppp!!!!
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Forget the "S" on the chest. While those geeky Superman movies made him a household name, as far as I'm concerned Christopher Reeve (1952-2004)'s career started in 1993 with his excellent portrayal of Mr. Farraday in Remains of the Day. He seemed like such a strange choice to play that role. But 5 minutes into the movie it became evident that there was more to him than the magnificent good looks -- yes, he could act. What happened to him was an unimaginable nightmare, but he took it on with dignity and remained hopeful throughout.

We Got Yer Back, Dubya - Ok I held off on posting this when it was first brought to my attention on salon, dismissing it as rubbish or a slick job of Photoshopping. But now it's all over the web and it was even mentioned in the NYT. Was Bush wired during the first debate? Here is the suspicious pic from the first debate. And now another one has emerged from the second debate. What's that thing between his shoulder blades? Was he getting a little help from behind the scenes with some kind of transmitter/receiver (which is not allowed in debates of course)? Was it some medical device or supportive brace? Was it a bulletproof kevlar vest? Or was it simply the folds of his jacket as the White House claims? There has even been a new web site constructed just for this story. Here are some more articles on this juicy matter.

10/9/04 - Round two of the debates last night, and not much new. It did get a bit more animated than last time, however, and at least it made for entertaining TV. They traded sharp jabs about Iraq, the environment, unemployment and taxes. At one point Bush seemed to lose his temper and even interrupted the moderator, insisting that he counterpunch a Kerry remark (hey Charles Gibson, grow some balls and enforce the rules of the debate plz). View the clip here (thanks Oliver Willis).
Overall most folks seem to be calling the debate a draw, or a slight win by Kerry. The fact that Bush was able to present himself better than last time around, and put Kerry on the defensive on a few issues scored him some points.

The Afghanistan elections took place today, the first election in 40 years. This is a huge step for that country, and I'm sure Dubya will be telling us all about it. One problem - the security measure in place to keep people from voting more than once consists of a non-permanent magic marker dot on the finger. An Afghan voter told NPR this morning that he was able to rub the mark off a few minutes after voting. Call me crazy, but this could have an impact on the election results...

10/8/04 - Apparently it IS possible to die of a broken heart. Dubya, how do you sleep at night? Anyway, round two of the debates kicks off tonight at Washington University in a town-hall style format. On the agenda are terror and the economy. Expect Dubya to make a point of NOT scowling and frowning, since that was what got him in trouble last time around.
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I need to share my feelings about Star Wars: Battlefront. I know it's pathetic to be so moved by a video game, but there's a good explanation. Much of my childhood was spent with a Star Wars action figure or miniature spacecraft in hand, twirling around while making explosion sounds with my mouth. To me this is the realization of these childhood dreams. And for the love of God, look at those screenshots (below, click to enlarge)! And as mentioned in my 8/27 post, the chance to zap Ewoks is too gratifying to pass up (since it's a well-known fact they the Ewoks single-handedly, er- pawingly, almost wrecked the original Star Wars films). Now, if only I can get a crack at Jar Jar Binks...

                        

10/7/04 - Some very distinguished members of the business/economics academic community share their thoughts on the current state of things with Dubya. They had asked me to sign on as well, but I was just too busy that day.

10/6/04 - At last, some respect: Rodney Dangerfield, 1922 - 2004. It's not that Caddyshack wouldn't have become a cult-classic without him. And it's not like no other comics could deliver a masterful one-liner. But nobody did it like Rodney. A few classics:

"I never got girls when I was a kid. One girl told me, `Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. There was nobody home."

"When we got married, the first thing my wife did was put everything under both names — hers and her mother's."

"With my wife, I get no respect. I fell asleep with a cigarette in my hand. She lit it."

"Every time I get in an elevator, the operator says the same thing to me: `Basement?"'

"I tell ya I get no respect from anyone. I bought a cemetery plot. The guy said, 'There goes the neighborhood!"'

More good stuff in his voice here: http://www.rodney.com/rodney/home/home.asp. Shine the spotlight on Rodney to start the laughs.

10/6/04 (cont.) - Catch the VP-OFF last night? If not you didn't miss much, though it was a bit more spirited than Thursday's lame presidential debate. Cheney and Edwards duked it out over security, gay marriage, the economy, Iraq, etc. The major networks are split in who was the 'winner.' And of course there is a lot of fact-checking going on over some of the claims. My favorite was the assertion by Cheney that due to Edwards' poor Senate attendance record, last night was the first time they had met in person. Of course this February 2001 shot tells a different story (thanks Atrios).

10/5/04 - Hell no, you WILL GO. Nobody seems to want to talk about it much, but it's out there. Quick, somebody break my ankles or something !

10/5/04 (cont.) The president clarifies his stance on US troops in Iraq (thanks David Letterman). Speaking of the prez, looks like he plans to set the record straight this Wednesday. I'm sure he'll fare better this time around, considering 1) that Kerry won't be there to respond and 2) he'll be back to his comfortable modus operandi, which consists solely of carefully prepared notes by his advisors.

10/3/04 - Guilty as charged - Guess if Micro$oft says I'm a thief, I'm a thief.

10/3/04 (cont.) I won Powerball! I won Powerball! I won Powerball!!!!!! Total winnings = $7.00. I must've gotten one number correct, along with the Powerball number. Effective today I will be setting up a trust fund for all of my family and friends to tap into as needed. If you're looking for me, I'll be on St. John.

10/1/04 (extra special debate edition, cont.) - I try, I really try not to buy into the whole Fox News thing. They can't really be as bad as Outfoxed says they are, can they? Apparently so.
Talking Points Memo reported that earlier today that Fox ran an article that listed a number of absurd John Kerry quotes, including things like "Women should like me, I do manicures!" and "I'm a metrosexual, he's a cowboy" describing himeself and the president. The article is still there, but the bizarre quotes have mysteriously vanished. Fortunately Talking Points Memo had saved the original version of the story and should have it posted later.

10/1/04 - First debate last night - no big surpises. Kerry rambled on about mistakes the prez has made in Iraq, Afghanistan, etc. while Dubya countered with the "mixed messages (read: 'flip-flop')" thing. No staggering blows were landed, although a few times Dubya seemed to fumble his words and struggle briefly. The media seems to be unanimous in naming Kerry as the "winner," based on his ability to speak confidently and appear "presidential." Dubya seemed to get a bit testy at times, especially when Kerry reminded him that it was bin Laden who attacked on 9/11/01, not Hussein. It was also noted that the president appeard to show up with 30 minutes of material for a 90 minute debate. More than once he finished his statements before his allocated time had run out, while Kerry used almost every second of his.

As for the fact-checking of the statements made, CNN has a roundup here. As expected, both candidates took a few liberties with their facts -- but nothing too outrageous. Although Dubya did argue that there are 100,000 trained Iraqi soldiers, which is simply not accurate. He arrived at that number by adding the Iraqi Army, National Guardsmen and the Iraqi Police as well -- in fact there are only about 34,000 Iraqi soldiers, only 1/3 or whom have completed their training.

Will Kerry's apparent "victory" last night make any difference in the polls? Depends on whether or not the momentum lasts in the media during the next few days. NPR has a great roundup of the entire evening here. More on this stuff later...

9/30/04 - Rumors are flying, or should I say wriggling, that Dennis Rodman is considering an NBA comeback at age 43. According to this article he is scheduled to work out with Carmello Anthony and the Denver Nuggets. Let the old guy play, says I! Not only will he put asses in seats to help declining NBA ticket sales, but I really think he could still make positive contributions off the bench. When he isn't acting like an idiot, Rodman is a one-trick pony specializing in rebounding - period. Thing is, he does it amazingly well. At his age he's certainly not as quick & mobile as some of these younger cats, but 90% of rebounding is timing and positioning.
Dennis -- get your old butt in shape and make this happen. We all know you have gambling/partying debts to pay off, and this could really help! But do us a favor and lose this newest 'do -- you look like Chris Tucker in "The Fifth Element."

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9/29/04 - Having his say - Hey, the man tells it like it is. And the rewards for daring to speak his mind? A possible 20 year prison sentence.

9/28/04 - SIGH... It's the end of an era :-(

9/27/04 - Debating the debates - So the debates begin on Thursday night, and I don't really understand why such a huge deal is made out of them. Let's face it -- both candidates will have been prepped by their advisors with "canned" answers to just about every conceivable question that could ever be asked. And are any questions going to be asked that Kerry & Bush haven't already been firing at each other during the past two months in the newspapers? Don't expect anything to be directly answered with a "yes" or "no". Every response will be a rambling duck+weave.
What it will come down to, of course, if who carries himself better - who appears more confident, well-spoken, nicely groomed, and who has better body-language. Even the colors of their cravates will have more of an impact than any snappy rhetoric.
But there is one other important factor that will come into play: who will get in that sharp jab to get the audience laughing/applauding? Who will have the witty comeback, that stoic patriotic statement that gets 'em out of their chairs? Or maybe Kerry can catch Dubya off-guard and lure him into using one of his 'Bushisms'. It'll be in the bag.

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Another campaign tidbit - old man Jimmy has chimed in about Florida. Let's hope that he's wrong...

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9/26/04 - At long last, the 2004 Block Island photos have been uploaded.

9/25/04 - Don't I feel guilty for all the times I've bitched & moaned about New England winters. At least we don't get pounded by hurricane on top of hurricane each summer.

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The End Is Near - But thankfully, not too near. According to this article, a peanut-shaped asteroid will pass within 1 million miles of the Earth this week. This rock is comparable in size to the one that supposedly brought the dinosaurs to their cataclysmic doom all those years ago, if you believe in that sort of thing. But rest assured, NASA geeks predict that we won't need to worry about being pelted into oblivion until 2562 -- mark your calendars.

9/24/04 - Sometimes a cartoon can sum things up better than any CNN article...

9/23/04 - They're coming, I swear! The Block Island pics, that is. I've been suh-lammed trying to catch up at work. Above is a teaser to hold everyone over :-)

9/22/04 - Kudos to ABC for having the cahones to air this (thank you Oliver Willis). I grow more sickened by the day.

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If it ain't broke... The Star Wars Trilogy has been re-re-re-re released this week on DVD to the delight of, well, no one. Actually that's not entirely true, I'm sure that it's selling like hot cakes. But why oh why does George Lucas keep messing with the originals? I can appreciate "cleaning up" some of the scenes that may have taken some damage over the past three decades. But many scenes have been completely re-done (this site has a nicely detailed breakdown of the alterations).
Although I will admit that all of this hubbub has prompted my curiosity, and I may plug in the original Star Wars on VHS this weekend to see if Greedo DID in fact get off a shot at Han... I didn't think he did, but who knows? Was this another one of Lucas' changes? If you have no idea what scene I refer to, then you are LOST to me!

9/21/04 - One not-so happy part of our vacation came on Saturday when we learned that Ben had passed away during the night. Ben was a shepherd/lab mix who happily lived out the sunset of his life with Kasey and Grover in Kent. Ben was adopted from the St. Francis Shelter in Cornwall, CT in December 2001. Aside from being exceedingly handsome (see this photo), he was particularly fond of taking walks, devouring treats and chasing his giggly-wiggly ball around the house. We'll all miss him dearly.

9/20/04 - Oh so THAT's the plan - Here's Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld on his plan to end the war (per USA Today):

"At some point the Iraqis will get tired of getting killed and we'll have enough of the Iraqi security forces that they can take over responsibility for governing that country."

And this is the guy that runs the U.S. military?

9/19/04 - Back from the Block! In a word, epic. Pictures to come as soon as we get caught up :)

9/10/04 - Our annual pilgrimage to Block Island starts on Saturday! We need it bad. Trust there will be 5,981 photos taken, and some video as well. Probably won't be doing any blogging while we're gone, unless of course Hurricane Ivan creeps his way up the East Coast and keeps us trapped inside the house. I can only take so much Scrabble and Boggle. We were out on the Block last September during Hurricane Isabella. Turned out to be much ado about nuttin' (though it made for some fantastic body surfing). We can only hope to be so lucky this time around.

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Meanwhile the campaigning rages on. The latest muckraking has revealed Bush was given preferential treatment during his stint with the National Guard. In fact records have indicated that he went AWOL and didn't show up for a required physical. The White House then produced some documents to prove that he met all of his requirements, but new evidence shows that these papers were forged. Blah Blah Blah. Nothing would suprise me anymore. But he's somehow leading in the polls, and it's looking more and more likely that we'll be enduring another four years of nonsense.
So why not poke a little fun? This might be my all-time favorite: speakers on, click here. If nothing else, another term with Dubya would be good for an occasional laugh. Gotta love Keith Oberman.

Now back to reality - on a more somber note, click here. Credit to Oliver Willis for the pic.

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Smile ladies, you're on 50 camera -- Heard on the radio the other day that rapper 50 Cent recently installed video cameras in every room of his "phat crib". This was done to protect himself against false sexual assault charges, a la R. Kelly, Kobe, etc. Hey a brutha gotta defend himself against gold-diggin' beeyatches & ho's, no-wut-I'm-sayin? Gimme a break.

9/8/04 - A dear old friend has recently departed for a much better place. Rusty (aka "Gus-Gus") was in the Sinacore family for 18 years. In his prime he was an adroit frisbee-catcher and alert watch dog. Back in the early 90's when I used to court Maria (the FIRST time around), he sent me scurrying out the door a number of times with a good feisty round of barking. Rest well, buddy.

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Vote for Dubya or be killed by terrorists. Whoa, we'd better do what Cheney says... Outrageous as that article is, at least I finally learned who the Vice President is.

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Alive and wriggling -- Earned my karma points today -- about five seconds into my commute a terrifyingly huge spider scuttled across the dashboard and nestled himself in the corner of the windshield, poised to strike (can you tell that I hate spiders?). I felt like Frodo being stalked by Shelob in Return of the King. My instinct, of course, was to grab the nearest solid object and squash him into jelly. But instead I took a deep breath & pulled into the parking lot at Panda Empire. After a few tense moments I was able to politely remove him from the car using the latest issue of eWeek. If that doesn't earn me a spot in heaven I don't know what will.

9/7/04 - From the Alarming Statistics Department, the "1000 mark" has been reached. No need to comment any further.

9/6/04 - Happy Labor Day to everyone. Hope no one is actually performing labor of any sort today.
I was combing the web over the weekend and found this. What the *&#*!$ IS that thing???? Oh wait, maybe it's a Weapon of Mass Destruction!

9/3/04 - Disowned by the very people he was supporting - Here's a good one on the political tip: If you caught any of Senator Zell Miller's anti-Kerry diatribe at the Republican Covention, you know what a comical old fellow he revealed himself to be. In fact he got so riled up during a post-speech news interview that he went so far as to challenge the interviewer to a duel -- ya know, with pistols and swords like in the old days.
But the best part is that the Republicans are not even standing behind him or his speech. Delicious!

9/2/04 - In its usual Me-Too fashion, Microsoft gasps, weezes, pants and scrambles along to keep stride with Apple's innovation. The MSN Music Store is set to launch this week, staggering to the plate to challenge Apple's iTunes Music Store. I'll pass, thanks...

In other news, Kobe is off the hook... for now. The prosecution decided to throw in the towel before things really got going. There is still a civil suit pending, and that will probably go on forever.
So is he a rapist? I doubt it. A cheating scumbag? Definitely. An egomaniac? Without question.
Why oh why didn't his hot wife dump him, collect about $35 million and scram with their gorgeous daughter?
Oh and one other thing, Kobe -- the Shaq-less Lakers are gonna stink next season, and you're going to be stuck heaving up 40 shots per game in loss after loss. Muwahahahahahaahahahah! (sinister laughter)

9/1/04 - Must... have... it... NOW! This modern miracle was released yesterday.

8/31/04 - A little dignity, please! Nothin' doin'! That picture will of course be shown to Aidan's prom date in 17 years, rest assured. Spent this past weekend at the beach in Rhode Island, and took some nice shots:

Beach Bum
Me napping with Aidan
Mary and Jeremy dorking out
Maria napping with Aidan
Cousin Savannah zonked out on the beach after consuming an entire bag of Sun Chips

While we were avoiding NYC and soaking up the sun, the protests raged on and on (thanks to viewfrombaxter for the pic). I read someplace that uber-hot actress Rosario Dawson was mistakenly arrested amidst the confusion while filming her next movie. Alas, I was not able to find any pictures of her in handcuffs...

8/30/04 - Reformed Olympic hater -- Alright so the Olympics grew on me, just like they always seem to. By the very end I was watching as much as possible. This seems to happen every four years (actually every two years if the Winter Olympics are factored in). At the outset I have my usual cynical outlook, and two weeks later I'm stifling a tear when the flame is quenched.
But come on, it's impossible to not be thrilled by finishes like this one, this one, or this one. Good stuff. Half the blink of an eye decides the winner. Your average everyday Sportscenter just doesn't have those kinds of goods. The Olympic athletes, in most cases, aren't going home to their pampered millionaire lifestyles after the sweat dries. Lose right now and 15 years of training was all wasted time. This shows in their effort and their intensity. It showed when the USA Men's basketball team (who WILL be going back to their pampered millionaire lifestyles) was humbled and forced to settle for bronze. They weren't prepared for that level of intensity and organized preparedness, which is rarely seen in the NBA.

So now what happens to Athens? The city definitely gets props for beating everyone's expectations and having everything perfectly prepared & secure in time for the events. But now they've got billions of dollars (or Lyros? or Euros?) worth of debt and several enormous stadiums that no one really has much use for. Not to mention thousands of un-eaten Gyros...

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Meanwhile, the warm NYC welcome for the Republican Convention continues, as noted here and here. In fact they turned out in the hundreds of thousands during the weekend to "welcome" the Republicans to town (thanks to citying for the pics). More great photo blogs from the NYC action can be found here:
http://www.brooklynvegan.com/archives/2004/08/republican_nati.html

http://www.seantconrad.com/archives/000478.html

http://www.viewfrombaxter.net/series/archives/protest/index.html

8/27/04 - Welcome to New York - The president is seeing a side of New Yorkers he's never seen before... (kudos to the Gothamist for the pics).

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On another note, I was recently watching a demo of this game, which looks like it's going to be absolutely great. At last I will be able to participate in some of the battles that I fantasized about endlessly in my youth. But more importantly I will be able to play on the side of the Empire and FRY EWOKS! That alone will be worth the price.

8/26/04 - Why my workouts kick ass these days - because of the jammin' slammin' booty-shakin' foot-stompin' toe-tappin' head-bobbin' workout playlist I have queued up in my trusty iPod, a snippet of which I'll share with you:

Linkin Park: "One Step Closer" - SHUT UP WHEN I'M TALKIN' TO YOOOOU!!!

Kool Moe Dee: "I Go To Work" - This IS a workout playlist, is it not? A throwback to old school when rap was simple and enjoyable. Nowadays most of these bling-bling bozos take themselves way too seriously.

Juno Reactor: "Pistolero" - Delicious techno-flavored gunslinging.

Prince: "Get Off" - The extended remix of course.

Propellerheads: "Spybreak" - Matrix fans recognize this one, great jam for flying through the air kicking asses.

Public Enemy: "Can't Do Nuttin' for ya Man" - Runnin' from your wife (YIKES!)

Pearl Jam: "Go" - The guitar at the end climbs higher and higher and higher,'til by the song's final drumbeat you're writhing on the floor in ecstacy.

Prodigy: "Smack My Bitch Up" - Any track off that album would do the trick for getting through a workout. Ooooh those beats, beats, beats...

Beastie Boys: "Super Disco Breakin'" - 'Well... it's... 50 cups o' coffee and you know IT'S ON!'

Save Ferris: "Come on Eileen" - With apologies to Dexy's Midnight Runners, this is a fun tribute to the original. Great for jumping around and acting like an idiot.

Led Zepplin: "The Lemon Song" - For the cool-down portion of the workout, love that mellow guitar that hovers, then rolls from one ear to the other. Dreamy.

Doug E Fresh/ Slick Rick: "Six Minutes" - Bring back the Beatbox!

Roots/Cody Chestnutt: "The Seed 2.0" - "I don't beg for no rich man..."

EPMD: "You Gots 2 Chill" - Impossible to NOT do the sideways head-bob to this one.

Bow Wow Wow "I Want Candy" - I Love the 80's Volume 2.

Fatboy Slim: "Build it up, Tear it Down" - Bubblegum Techno, big fun.

System of a Down: "Toxicity" - I need ANGER RIGHT NOW or this workout is over.

House of Pain: "Top o' the Morning To Ya" - 'These Irish eyes are smilin', I'm buckwildin''

The playlist is subject to constant rotations/substitutions of course, and suggestions are welcome.

8/25/04 - At least the gobs of cash that is guillotined out of our paychecks is being put to good use... That does it, I'm going to work for Halliburton.

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Best of luck (and of course, RESPECT) to Rodney, who will undergo heart surgery this week. When asked how long he will be in the hospital he responded: "If things go right I'll be there about a week. If things don't go right I'll be there about an hour and a half."

8/24/04 - Chalk one up for the terrorists - we had the plan of plans for this coming weekend. Some friends of friends who live in the city are going on vacation and offered us the chance of a lifetime - free use of their appartment for an entire weekend! Free lodgings in NYC? Are you kidding me? Well, not entirely free, we would have had to feed their cat & change the litter box.
Buuuuuuuuuuuuut -- given that the Republican Convention will be going on and all of the potential craziness and possible evil-doings, we're staying put. Terrorist scumbags 1, NYC tourists 0. No people-watching in Central Park, no visits to the Soho Apple Computer Store, no peanuts from street vendors, no $5 Rolex watches, no breakfast at the Crooked Tree creperie. Call us paranoid, but now that we're parents our outlook has changed. If it were just Maria and I, we wouldn't mind getting blown to bits by a suicide bomber. But not our lil' Duppy Conqueror. Maybe next time.

8/23/04 - Ouch! Found this scathing resume posted for GWB by the sardonic bomb. Definitely worth a read.

8/22/04 - PSSSSTT! Hey you -- wanna buy a painting?
Sorry, I couldn't resist. But wait, this gets even better -- according to this article, the stolen Munch masterpieces were not insured against theft. HAHAHAHAHAHA! Didn't those guys at the museum ever see The Thomas Crowne Affair? Here's a nifty article that compiles a list of some of the most daring art heists of all time, a few of which are still under investigation.

8/21/04 - This just in: USA Olympic Men's Hoops Team Stinks! OK maybe that's a bit harsh, but I caught the end of Saturday's game against Lithuania. Team USA has no idea how to score against a zone defense, and no idea how to defend against a high pick-and-fade. Lithuania used that play over and over late in the game, freeing up their star-to-be guard Sarunas Jasikevicius at the top of the key. Jaskievicius was all too happy to drain three pointer after three pointer and seal the win. Just for good measure he even threw in a pump-fake to draw a foul and collect the rare, coveted four-point play. Even though he played college ball at Maryland, the NBA didn't show any interest in him. Rest assured, Mr. Jasikevicius' phone will be ringing off the hook within the next few months, regardless of the outcome of the Olympics. He can pre-order his Cadillac Escalade right now if he wants to.

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On another Olympic note, will everyone please settle down about the skimpy outfits worn by the US Women's Beach Volleyball team? I've done some research and found three important things to consider here: 1) Beach Volleyball is all about keeping cool and keeping mobile 2) Since these games are in Athens Team USA is paying tribute to the original Olympic athletes, who competed in the buff 3) It's all about ratings, which tend to be quite high when Team USA Women's Beach Volleyball competes :-)

8/20/04 - Hook, line and percolator - So we signed up with Gevalia the other day. If you haven't heard of them, they offer a coffee delivery service. Every month or so subscribers receive a 1/2 pound of gourmet java in the mail. You get to specify what kind of beans you'd like, and how often you'd like your shipments to arrive. Our real goal in signing up, or course, was to take advantage of their special offer for a free coffee maker that comes with enrollment. We would then cancel the service one week later (keeping the machine of course!).
But after just one cup this morning, we may have to keep our subscription alive. It was mocha java bliss, and I'm in big trouble. Not only is the stainless steel coffee-brewing behemoth we received from Gevalia a work of art, but the coffee was DAMN GOOD. And Gevalia's catalog of savory beans from exotic locations across the globe has me ensnared with no hope of ever escaping. Reading the coffee bean descriptions transports me to the lush, tropical regions where the beans are painstakingly harvested. On one page I'm scaling Hawaii's Mt. Hualala, the next page I'm hacking my way through a Brazillian rain forest. Before I know it I've checked off every coffee on the goddamn list to be included in next month's order.

   

8/19/04 - To the suprise of no one, there's been another vague terror alert issued. Couldn't have anything to do with a certain event soon taking place in NYC, could it? Hmmmmm...........

Speakers on, volume up! Did the question catch him off-guard? Or is he just plain dumb as a stump? Either way, this sound-byte is just TOO delicious not to post. Props to the bitter shack of resentment for the link.

8/18/04 - M'aidez! M'aidez! NPR reported yesterday that US Airways might resort to leeching off of the pension plans of its retirees to help pay back a government loan. It's no secret that the troubled airline is en route to a 2nd bankruptcy. [Cue in maniacal laughter] Muwahahahahahahahaha! [end maniacal laughter].



I used to fly USAir a great deal when I was with my previous employer, and I've flown them off and on over the years for personal trips. So I don't mind sharing a brief snippet of the letter I'm composing to US Air "...for every $900 seat you've charged me that should have been $279, for every neverending check-in line that snaked its way across the airport, for every bitchy flight attendant, for every cancelled or delayed flight, for every connection at the infamous Philadelphia hub (are there ANY direct US Air flights to anywhere??), for every refusal to allow me to redeem my bonus miles, for every time the guy next to me was allowed to move to first class because he was uncomfortable (while I had to continue staring at the scalp in front of me), for refusing to serve something meatless for my vegetarian wife-to-be, for every long hour spent sitting on a runway not allowed to even stand up (let alone de-plane)... I wish your airline nothing but misery as you spiral out of the sky and crashland into financial ruin. Time to sell your jets to a real airline like Jet Blue and get out of the game."

8/17/04 - So here's the thing about Julia, and shame on me for not posting about her on Friday when she passed away at age 91. When we're on our deathbeds are we going to wish we had eaten more rice cakes or more Pate a Choux? Now of course some would argue that too much Pate a Choux would land us all onto our deathbeds. But Julia always preached that moderation is the key, and that people should not be afraid of food -- ".. we must never lose sight of a beautifully conceived meal," she once said. Sure it's important to watch what we eat and make sensible choices at the table. But whether it's six cavemen crouched around a firepit grunting and passing around hunks of a woolly mammoth carcass, or fifteen family members laughing over a Thanksgiving turkey/mashed potato feast, sharing good food is something we were meant to do.
Looking around the web I found these juicy Julia soundbytes.

Oh and while we're on the subject of food (Julia would back me on this one) -- our bodies need carbs. They are critical for our body's processes. When will this absurd fad end???

8/16/04 - OK so I'll admit to watching a few Olympic tidbits here and there over the weekend. Anyone catch the "Nightmare" -- oops I mean the "Dream" Team get clowned by Puerto Rico yesterday? Shameful. I'm ready to lace 'em up and catch a flight to Athens. I might be able to shoot a jumper that doesn't bounce off the side of the backboard.
Spent a nice afternoon dining and making merry at Geoff and Marcy Cooke's yesterday. Took some nice shots (click the link, each will open in a separate window):

Geoff & Makenna going head to head
Alex and Makenna strikin' a pose
Sarge and Peg
Cris and Sophia
Everyone in this photo is making a stupid face, so I had to post it
Stephen and Sophia
Sarge and Duppy
Makenna coming in for a closer look at Duppy

8/13/04 - 2004 Summer Olympics kick off this weekend, where countries forget their differences and engage in thrilling competitions to see who can best hide the traces of performance-enhancing drugs used by their athletes.
That whole business is sickening. One can't help but wonder about all of the great athletes who broke records and achieved athletic greatness over the past 25 years, before there was much testing at all for that sort of thing. How many of those great athletes (won't bother rattling off names) were really that great after all?
I won't watch the games at all, unless every cable channel that is NOT NBC suddenly stops working. Even though it will be amusing to hear how Jim McKay deals with the resounding chorus of boos every time an American athlete is announced.

8/10/04 - I try to avoid getting too political (or serious) here, but the timeline/graph compiled in this blog is definitely worth a look.

8/7/04 - The end is near -- Planning a trip to the Carribean in the near future? You may want to reconsider. In fact, we should all consider moving inland. According to this MSNBC article, someday soon we're all going to be swallowed up by enormous killer tidal waves without any warning. We're all in big trouble. Don't walk, RUN!

8/6/04 - Check out 'Bourne Supremacy' if you get a chance -- cool flick, we saw it last week (for free!). Things will prolly make more sense if you see 'Bourne Identity' first, so run out and rent it if need be. Don't be scared off by the tired Spy-Thriller genre that this one falls under by default. This one is well worth the trip. Unlike his best buddy Ben Affleck, Matt Damon can act. Although Ben was automatically elevated to hero status among Guy-dom for the whole J-Lo thing. But I digress... Anyway, check out the Rotten Tomato review here for the opinions of the experts.

8/5/04 - Came across this awesome hoop shoe timeline today. *SIGH* the memories come rushing back... And while on the subject of Air Jordans, sounds like Team USA could really use Mike's services. After getting trounced by Italy earlier this week in an exhibition game, Team USA squeaked by Germany (who, it's worth mentioning, failed to qualify for Athens) on Allen Iverson's luck-laden desperation buzzer-beating 3-point heave. Hell -- don't stop with MJ, why not blow the dust off of Ewing, Bird, Drexler, Magic and the rest of the original USA Dream Teamers to get the job done. Hey 2004 Team USA: Where are your hearts, fellas? Hoops was born in the US!

8/4/04 - Yes, yesterday was Dooms Day. Per my 7/15/04 posting Doom 3 was finally released to the general public. I scrambled over to the mall at lunchtime to grab my copy of course, and the 3.5 hours between the end of my lunch and quittin' time were very long indeed :)
According to id Software the game was 4 years in the making. And according to this CNN article id's hard work is paying off, and deservedly so. Programming deity John Carmack has changed gaming forever.

From this old-school gamer's perspective it is nothing short of a masterpiece. The level of texture detail and the overall graphical beauty is mindboggling. The game's visuals are on par with modern animated films like 'Finding Nemo.' Only there's nothing cute and cuddly here -- this game is dark and terrifying. Picture being trapped inside of your all-time scariest horror movie. I jumped in my seat about four times, and yelled out loud once (hope no one heard). The word disturbing comes to mind when you wander across scenes like this. As you can see from that screenshot, this is not kids stuff. A good comparison would be the scene at the end of the movie 'Silence of the Lambs' when Agent Starling (played by Jodie Foster) was in the pitch-black basement of the sicko killer dude. She couldn't see a thing, and was stumbling around trembling in terror. Meanwhile the sicko killer dude ("It puts the lotion in the basket. It does this when it's told") is only three feet away, peering at her through night-vision specs and lickin' his chops. Demons from hell of course can see fine in the dark sans night-vision specs. You're limited to the dim beam of light from your flashlight (jeez in 2134 you'd think night-vision specs would be standard issue for US Marines).
Do stop by the house for a demo, just be sure to bring a change of underwear :)

8/3/04 - Why I should be in the Secret Service - Was sifting through the pictures taken during the weekend gathering at my father's and came across this action photo shown here. Clearly Lilly (airborne) had been hired to do a suicide bombing leap to try and take out Duppy. But rest assured, Jesse Leo-dot-commers, my Neo-like reflexes saved the day. Had this pic been taken 1/10th of a second later it would've shown me performing a dextrous pivot move to pull Duppy out of harm's way, followed up with an aggressive fanny-bump which sent Lilly scrambling.

8/2/04 - Dodging syringes & oil slicks - Read with disgust today that someone named Christopher Swain swam the length of the Hudson River. Yech! I feel filthy coming within two miles of that Bog of Eternal Stench. Can't imaging immersing myself in it to swim for 315 miles. Here is Mr. Swain's official site.

7/29/04 - Visited Take Time Relaxation Center yesterday to make good on a gift certificate for a free massage! Wow. It was therapy on so many levels. There's no question that a properly done professional massage does more than help sore muscles/joints. You can actually feel life's stressors being dislodged and dispersed with each pass -- there goes the overdue CL&P bill... that was the bitchy client I forgot to call back... At times painful, at times otherwordly, I can't recommend it enough. And check your guilt at the door. This shouldn't be viewed as an occassional personal indulgence, but as a required sanity-saver.

7/27/04 - How could I NOT post that pic? This was recently taken during a Mason visit. First they'll be sharing thumbs, then action figures, then trading cards, then video games, then who knows -- girlfriends?

7/25/04 - Adventures in Baby Shitting -- Bit of a false alarm over the past few days. Duppy had gone a full 3 1/2 days sans pooping. We were starting to worry that the transition to real food was playing havoc with his cute little bowels. A call to the doc set our minds at ease, as they assured us that this is fairly common. To "move things along" we gave him an ounce or two of prune juice *blech*, and this must have done the trick. Yesterday afternoon he went! Boy did he ever -- it took every ounce of courage to dispose of that mess. Can't we just do breast milk until junior high school?

Hey anybody catch the BoSox/Yankees near-brawl on SportsCenter? If more baseball games were like that I might actually start watching it.

7/22/04 - Duppy recently had his first foray in to a swimming pool, and it didn't go as well as we'd hoped. But I will admit that the water was a bit on the chilly side, so we'll keep at it. Although I can't imaging how he's going to fare this September on Block Island when we immerse him in the frigid Atlantic Ocean surf...

7/19/04 - Saw Fahrenheit 9/11 yesterday. Content aside it's an incredibly well-made documentary, oozing with powerful war and Senate Hearing footage. Why doesn't that stuff make it to CNN? Hmmm. Now for the facts, many of which have been disputed and labeled as half-truths. Lets take a very conservative number here. Let's assume that, oh I dunno, 25% of the claims made by Moore in the film are exactly as Moore says they are. Even if 3/4 of the film is later proven to be innacurate, the problems with the White House are STILL much worse than you think. I'm talkin' worse than Watergate. The infamous botched Florida vote count rigged? Select Bin Laden family members allowed to fly out of the US on 9/12/01, when the airspace is closed to everyone else in the country? Bin Laden allowed to escape so as to not decrease the oil money coming in to the Bush family? The Patriot Act signed by Congress without anyone having read it? And much more. Fightin' words, to be sure, and a lot of comical cheap shots taken. But regardless of your political stance (or lack thereof), it's something that everyone should see.

7/15/04 - This will be a day to remember for gamers. ID Software announced earlier that Doom 3 has finally gone "gold master", which is the last step before mass duplication. I almost wept with joy upon reading this news. Details (about the game development, not my tears of joy) are available in Todd Hollenshead's .plan file.
Now I know what you're thinking. Now that I'm a dad how can I even spare a single thought for gaming, let alone a single moment. But rest assured my priorities are in order. In the past 2 months I've played a total of about 1.5 hours of Counter-Strike (my previous gaming obsession), and all of it done while Duppy was asleep. Again, I know what you're thinking -- I have a mortgage to pay! I have diapers to buy! How could I cough up $49.95 for a game!!? Well this one is pre-paid with credit earned from trading in old games with EB! The net-net of all this is that I REFUSE TO FEEL GUILTY ABOUT MY GUILTY PLEASURE!!!! TTthhhpppttt!!!!!

7/14/04 - Alex I'll take smart mother f-ers, for $300. Nobody likes a know-it-all, but it's getting hard not to cheer for this guy. Ken Jennings has won 30 consecutive days on Jeopardy! and crossed the $1,000,000 prize mark last night. Night after night he runs roughshod over the other contestants, often quadrupling the nearest score. There is no subject that he is not well-steeped in -- pro soccer, opera, 13th century Japanese art, Shakespeare, US history, Civil War generals, the US Constitution, single-celled organisms that begin with the letter "L"... And even when he appears stumped, he's quick on the trigger and is able to produce an educated guess that is better than most folks' researched answer. But most importantly, his answers are always phrased in the form of a question.

7/12/04 - Feeding Frenzy -- Recently began the slow, messy transition to solid foods. For Aidan, that is -- I've been doing solid foods for a few years now. At this point it's more practice than anything else, since he just sort of spittles the cereal mush back out his mouth and all over his chin & bib. But it's a start. We're guessing that once he really gets rolling with solids, the level of disgustingness in his poopy-diapers will increase exponentially. As it is NOW I can't change him without donning a gasmask, labcoat and kitchen gloves. Better start looking on ebay for that radiation suit now.

7/7/04 - Long time no blog. Been insanely absurdly busy, my bad. But I have a good excuse -- almost all of last week was spent out in Washington (the state, not DC) to oversee a promotion we've been running for a certain client (hint: really really really really big software company). What a fantastic state -- clean air, friendly people, and a snow-capped Mt Rainier on the horizon wherever you are. We must have lucked out though. As gorgeous as the weather was while we were there, the locals assured me that it REALLY DOES rain as much in Seatle as people say it does.
The promotion went over very well, and the client seemed quite pleased. We stayed in a gorgeous hotel right on Lake Washington. We took in a Seattle Mariners game. We made someone's day by awarding them a BMW. All in all a good experience. EXCEPT FOR THE TRAVEL...
Is it me, or should coach seating be illegal for flights over three hours? Maybe I've become a snob, or maybe old age has weakened my threshold for pain/discomfort. But 4 1/2 hours into the flight to Seattle, I was truly past the level of human tolerance. I just can't sit straight upright, arms at my side for that long. I resorted to Buddah breathing exercises to get through each agonizing second. My limbs were screaming to be stretched. And sleeping is out of the question, unless someone is willing to pay for three months worth of chiropractic adjustments for the crick in my neck.

6/23/04 - It's MY birthday today, it's all about ME, and I'm NOT ashamed to say it :-)
Let's see, 33... 33... not so bad. Larry Bird. Scotty Pippen. Patrick Ewing. All great hoopsters who sported the number 33 at one time. OK 33 aint so bad.
So far I've gotten a very nice card from Duppy, along with some Foot Powder for my stinky feet. But I'm starting to think that this is the first sign of my downfall -- most of the gifts I receive from this point forward will be powders, ointments, pills, salves and the like to help with the various personal problems that arrive with old age. That's it, I'm going back to bed.

6/18/04 - Dieu Merci for Baby Einstein. It has the ability to turn the sourest sourpuss into a mesmerized, slack-jawed zombie (see this photo, recently taken during a screening of Baby Mozart). If you haven't seen it, Baby Einstein is a DVD series that consists, basically, of closeup shots of toys in action set to classical music. Maria received the entire collection for her baby shower. Soldiers march up and down ladders, mechanical barking dogs waddle across the screen, hand-puppets play tricks on one another and wind-up insects flutter their wings -- all the while "The Marriage of Figaro" plays gently in the background. The woman that thought this stuff up is pure genious. And pure wealthy.
The effect on Duppy is unbelievable. Those times when he is at his worst -- wailing in misery & going to great lengths to remind his parents that his life consists of one tragedy after another -- these are the times when we fire up the DVD player, plop him in front of an episode of "BE", and let it work its magic. Whether it's the soothing music or the images in motion, it settles him down instantaneously. Call it a bail-out, call it what you will... sometimes we need a minute.

6/16/04 - As the confetti trickles down from the ceiling and becomes nested in Ben Wallace's 'fro, get in line behind me and the rest of the basketball watching population who felt the Pistons were going to win maybe one NBA Finals game, maybe. Who could've possibly imagined they would not only win in five games, but completely dominate? And it would have been a four game sweep if not for a miraculous Kobe Bryant shot in game 2. The Pistons D was awesome, most of the time it looked like the Lakers were trying to score against 7 or 8 guys.
Do we feel bad for the Lakers? Naaah. When the tears dry, they're still young multi-millionaires who get paid enormous sums of cash to play a game. Look for a completely gutted and revamped LA squad next season, with Phil Jackson gone and Kobe & several other players wearing different colored unis in far away cities (unless of course Kobe's uni is all orange and sports a five-digit number on the back. But that's another story).

6/11/04 - Note to self: regarding the 'Great Ones' that are getting long in the tooth but are still alive and performing, see them live before it's too late!

While not as exciting as Game 2, last night's Game 3 was once again worth the missed sleep to watch the Pistons dimantle the Lake-Show by 20. This 2004 version of the Detroit 'Bad Boys' brings the same suffocating "D" as the 1989 and 1990, minus the technical fouls, the elbows, the pushing, the trash talking, and the Bill Laimbeering. This MSNBC article does a good job of comparing the two squads.

6/9/04 - Alright Kobe, that shot was lucky. And so was that one. And that one. In case you missed the NBA Finals game last night, it was worth the missed sleep. Pistons were on the verge of going up 2-0 on the series, when Kobe tied the game with a deep three with 2 ticks to go. In OT the he and Shaq took care of business, so we are tied at 1 game apiece. A very Jordan-esque performance on the part of KB8. DAMN!
A bevy of birthdays have come and gone since my last post, which was about 77 years ago. Included amongst the "May Babies" are my father, my sister, Uncle Bubba, Nina, and a host of others. What is it about May that makes it such a popular time to come bobsledding out of the womb? June is much preferred IMHO (In My Humble Opinion).

5/26/04 - Aidan recently had the pleasure of meeting his brand new cousin Mason. As you can see from the joyful expressions on their little faces, they are destined to become best buds. They spent the day hanging out in Kent being passed around by various family members, and later enjoying a snack together.
And we just learned that Mason, Brian and Nina will be joining us on Block Island this September! Yay, an extra set of chubby legs on the beach!

5/14/04 - Well it had to end sometime, sniff sniff. After 11 years and a whopping 31 Emmys, Frasier uttered the famous "Goodnight, Seattle" one last time. Some have argued that Frasier "jumped the shark" when Daphne jumped into the RV with Niles and they sped off together. "PIFFLE!" says I.
The last episode was a satisfying finale that put closure on the life stories of all of the secondary characters -- Roz took over the radio station, Niles and Daphne had their baby, Martin got hitched, and even Kenny ran off to pursue a DJ career. As for Fras, he left Seattle for San Fran to start anew. Or did he? Won't spoil it here, but the ending left his life open-ended and optimistic and hopeful (while also leaving room for a potential spin-off?).
But for now, where does that leave the long-time Frasier fan? What does the barren wasteland that TV has become have to offer to the viewers with the more -- shall we say -- sophisticated palette? Nada! So pour me a sherry and bring on the re-runs and DVD boxed sets!

5/10/04 - Got to meet the newest addition over the weekend -- congrats to Nina and Brian on the Saturday arrival of Mason James Shultz! He gave his mommy a bit of a rough time on the delivery, but it all worked out OK in the end. Woohoo! Now Aidan has a buddy to boss around/be bossed around by! I'll post more Mason pix ASAP.

Happy belated Mom's Day to all of the mothers in my life -- Patricia, Dorothy, Patti, Marie, Nanclyn and a host of others, I love you all. And of course Happy Mom's Day to my Maria. For her first time around she received pancakes in bed, of course.

5/6/04 - Damnit, someone stole my idea. I just read that a real-life restaurant named "Rick's Cafe" has opened in Casablanca. It is run and owned by Kathy Kriger, and entreprenuer from Portland. The good news is she's studied the "Rick's" from the film and has gone to great lengths to make the place as authentic as possible. But I was "shocked, SHOCKED" to learn that there is NO gambling!

5/5/04 - Windows users, quick! Read this before the SASSER worm shuts down your computer! Mac users, read on at your leisure (hoo hoo hoo, couldn't resist). But seriously folks, get the info on the fix here. Our Windows XP computer appears to be infected, if not with SASSER than with something similarly nasty. Not the end of the world, since that computer only gets turned on if I need to play Counter Strike (what other use is there for a Windows computer?). Doh! There I go again!

5/2/04 - ...no, not the plank. Blaine will walk with the rest of the Virginia Tech grads in two weeks and receive his diploma! Who'd have thunk it? And we all thought he was going on the "Eight Year Plan." Congrats, dude! Details to be posted when we get 'em.

4/26/04 - First sh*t-eating grin caught on film! Aidan has supposedly been smiling off and on for a week now, but I didn't believe it until Maria showed me that photo. But then again she may have Photoshopped his lips into an upward curve, so I still have my doubts...
Speaking of Maria, she got hooked up over the weekend with this awesome new Mandy Moore 'do. Ain't she gorgeous? Great job Kate, she loves it!

4/19/04 - SNOT that big of a deal, but... Aidan has major nasal drip issues during the night. By 1:00AM each breath has become a thundering chorus of booger vibration sounds. For some reason it makes me cringe, fingernails-across-the-chalkboard style. Makes us wanna hold a Kleenex over his shnoz and yell "BLOW, DAMNIT!" But of course that won't happen. We've tried a small turkeybaster-like device to suck the stuff out, but it doesn't really work that well. Parents out there, any suggestions to combat this issue would be greatly appreciated! Hot steam? Vicks Vapor Rub?

4/18/04 - A co-worker forwarded this movie to me -- AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!

4/13/04 - Birthday wishes to the mother of the entire fam-i-lee !

4/8/04 - Mom, send money... and Kevlar - Came across this article, rather alarming...

4/7/04 - Congrats to the Huskies, both the dudes and the babes cleaned up the tourney nicely. Be sure to flip over a few cars during the celebration.

4/6/04 - Attention, Gods of Chance or whoever is in charge of the Luck Department, go $%*#& yourself. I read this morning that J-Lo's mom hit a $2.4 million jackpot in Atlantic City the other day. Like she really needs the cash...

4/3/04 - Attention songwriters everywhere, old and new: DO NOT use the word "baby" followed up by "crazy" anymore. PLEASE. THEY DON'T RHYME. THEY HAVE BEEN USED TOGETHER IN 469 OTHER SONGS. JUST STOP ALREADY!
Sorry, had to vent. Save the music... someone...

3/30/04 - My brush with a billionaire: Was visiting Mark Cuban's blog recently. For those who don't know, Cuban is the boisterous billionaire who owns the Dallas Mavericks NBA team. Just for a goof I decided to email him a link to this ESPN article (thanks Blaine), which basically accuses the NBA of rigging games to improve TV ratings. I asked him if, in his opinion, the NBA is corrupt enough to pull a stunt like that.

I really wasn't expecting anything to come of it (come on, how many billionaires actually check emails sent to them by mere mortals, let alone respond to them). Low and behold, 15 minutes later an email shows up in my inbox from, believe it or not... Mark Cuban! No way! The message consisted of four words: "No, it's not true." At the bottom it was signed by "M".

I know what you're thinking -- it was obviously sent by one of the countless minions who is paid hourly to respond to Cuban's messages. BUT DON'T RUIN IT FOR ME! IF THIS IS TO BE MY PATHETIC "15 MINUTES", SO BE IT!

3/28/04 - Finally got around to posting some pics of Aidan, click here.

Forgot to mention the trouncing that took place last week, ending the Deflators' dismal season at 4-9. Cardiology Specialists of whatever the hell their name was ran us off the court by 18. But hey, we had a good time. Before leaving the court bleeding and sobbing, we grouped together for one team photo.

3/23/04 - We saw in some artsy magazine that the cool thing to do is to take photos of your newborn's body -- shots of the feet, hiney, back of the neck, head, nose, belly, etc from all sorts of creative angles. These shots are then framed (in black and white, bien entendu) and hung up as the decorative theme for one of the rooms in the house. How chic! How New Canaan! Count us in!
And I know that the full gallery of Aidan pics for this site is PAINFULLY overdue. They're coming, I promise!

3/22/04 - Anyone catch that bit about Social Security on Sunday Morning yesterday? Now more than ever I'm convinced that I'll never retire. Forty-nine years from now I'll simply topple over while packing boxes on some assembly line. Click here for the depressing story...

3/19/04 - Read with horror this morning that Jabari, longtime prisoner of the Dallas Zoo, was hunted down and shot dead after escaping from his pen. Apparently Jabari had been provoked by some kids prior to scaling a wall to escape his confines. During his "rampage" as zoo officials have called it, he injured a mother and her toddler son. Boo freakin' hoo. I've half a mind to pull an 'Ace Ventura' and tour the country sneaking into zoos after hours, setting all of the animals free.

3/18/04 - Attention schoolbus drivers, school superintendent, whoever: We walked to/from school for a lot of years -- often in weather that was horrendously cold or dizzyingly hot. We dodged crazed drivers, avoided talking to shady strangers, ran from the bullies & lugged armloads of books/science projects. It's OK for kids to walk 20 yards or so to get from the door of their schoolbus to their house. A high percentage of kids in this country are obese and could use the exercise. It is not necessary make 13 stops between Terrywile Park and Sunset Drive. There shouldn't be a convoy of furious drivers lined up behind the bus by the time it reaches Terre Haute. Enough already! Geez!

3/17/04 - I don't know where the whole Patrick's Pot thing started. Will someone from the Morris clan please email me the origins? Basically every St. Patty's Day the goal is to catch another family member off-guard with a resounding "MY PATRICK'S POT ON YOU." What a bunch of blarney! Anyway, have a great St. Patty's Day. Better get in line early at Molly Darcy's, those green pints are goin' fast!

3/15/04 - Stop what you're doing and buy a new toothbrush RIGHT NOW. I stumbled upon this very unnerving article over the weekend...

3/11/04 - Mars Needs Garbage... I have hit a grand slam homerun with this idea. This is big time. Frequent jesseleo.com'ers may recall my 1/5/04 post where I was bitchin' and moanin' about NASA. I'm very pissed that they hack our hard-earned paychecks to shreds in order to send spaceships to Mars to examine (credit to humor columnist Dave Berry here) ROCKS. *&!#$ing ROCKS! Why? Why? Why?

But check out this brilliant idea: okay ready? Garbage. Landfills. The Dump. According my own very scientific independent study, all of us will live on top of or in close proximity to a landfill by the year 2018. A thousand years from now Earth civilizations will dig to find clues about how people lived in 2004, and what will they find? RUBBISH! Piles and piles of it. Most of the blame should go to Aidan and his diapers (more on that later). But nevermind that.

So why doesn't NASA do this: construct a number of HUGE spaceships, say, one for each state. Load each ship to the brim with tons and tons of garbage from the respective state's largest landfill. 3, 2, 1 LIFTOFF!! Off to space they go, Mars or bust! Surely this is a better plan than simply burying all this rubbish. Repeat this process overy decade or so, and we'll be fine. Some environmentalists will argue that we have no right to pollute our sister planet in this way. OK fine, launch the garbage cruisers straight towards the sun -- when they get close enough, poof! Gone.
I'm a freaking genious.

3/10/04 - You'll be happy, I'm sure, to know that the Deflators ended their regular season with a 64-56 win over Beefy Rage yesterday evening. That brought our sordid regular season record to 4-8. But praise be to the War Memorial Industrial League, EVERYONE makes the playoffs! Schedule will be posted as soon as we have it. Skeptics are calling for "one and done," but I see us winning the whole damn thing.
The DeRhams (from the Vermont family contingent) will be in town this weekend to meet Aidan and check out the new crib. Little do they know that to gain admittance to said new crib, they must agree to change diapers. While they're doing that I will hopefully have time to upload some more painfully cute photos...

3/4/04 - A thousand apologies for the lack of updates. This whole fatherhood thing has left me with no time for blogging, picture-posting, or anything else for that matter. But rest assured we have about a gigabyte of photos and video clips of the little bugger that will be posted ASAP.

2/23/04 - For some moments there simply are no words...

2/20/04 - Hung up on Hung... From the "Now I've Seen Everything" Department, I read yesterday that American Idol contestant William Hung has become an international superstar for his unwatchably terrible rendition of Ricky Martin's 'She Bangs.' He has his own website, goes on tours and talkshows, and was recently given a $25,000 recording contract somewhere. I... I... I... just can't think of anything to say about this...

2/19/04 - THIS JUST IN -- The shower is back on for Saturday, 2/21 at 11:00AM! The results of the amnio showed that the baby is still not ready for delivery, but doc has agreed to give Maria a "Get Out Of Jail Free" card for a few hours on Sat. So the shower is officially un-cancelled. Hope you can make it!
As for the baby, doc says that while growth is still taking place, it has slowed down somewhat. Not really a cause for alarm, but ultrasounds will be performed regularly throughout the week. Labor induction will take place on Thursday, 2/26 by hook or by crook (unless of course the little bugger decides to pop on his or her own before then). W00t!

2/18/04 - Bedknobs and Boredom... As the status of mom and baby is still very much up in the air, the baby shower that was originally scheduled for this weekend has been postponed indefinitely. We're calling everyone who has RSVP'ed but please pass the word if you talk to anyone. We'd hate to have folks show up this weekend at the condo, giftwrapped rattlers and strollers in hand, only to be met with a locked door. The latest news is that a second amniocentesis will be performed on Thursday to see if the baby's pipes have developed any further. Earlier this week, Yale New Haven hospital confirmed that more time is needed for lung development. So it they're still not fully developed, the wait continues. But hey, at least the food is good (hah!). Personally I'm in favor of waiting. As the little one is certainly destined to one day become an Olympic sprinter, we need those lungs to be at 100% before delivery.
Many thanks to everyone for the visits, the calls and the general displays of support. To help assuage the ennui mom has been plowing through books/magazines, inhaling Jerry Springer, and counting the cracks between the ceiling tiles. But starting today she is doing some side work on a laptop. The dough is pretty decent, and it should help the hours fly by.

2/16/04 - The waiting game... The wait continues at Danbury Hospital. The amnio test has been sent to Yale New Haven for a second opinion on whether or not the baby is ready. If they give the go-ahead, then labor may be induced as early as Tuesday! The President's Day holiday has slowed down the process, unfortunately, so it's more bad hospital food for another day at least.
I tried to put myself in the little one's shoes and well, I think if given the choice I'd take the toasty warm safety of the womb over a cold, cruel world anyday. It's the same advice I usually give to college kids: postpone reality as long as possible! But that's just me ;)

2/14/04 - Close shave... Back to the hospital yesterday, as mom's blood pressure was still yo-yo'ing around. Pending the results of an amnio test this morning, doc was thinking of inducing labor this weekend! But the results showed that baby needs a little more time for lung development. So, mom will be taking it easy for another week or two while the little one sits tight.

2/12/04 - Long overdue Deflators update -- three straight consecutive whuppings, last night's by Pippa's. This drops our record to a painful 3-7. SIGH... Next fiasco, I mean game, is scheduled for 2/22 at 11:00AM versus someone called the 'Flava Unit' (they should start the game with a technical foul for their team name).

On the Mom front, she is doing OK. Doc has ordered her to spend every minute of every day lying on her left side while sipping prune juice and downing multi-vitamins. This is getting old very fast, so DO give her a cheering up call if you get a chance.

Earlier this week I got to ride a Segway! Some clients met us at the office and happened to have one in the car (a paltry attempt to 'wow' us, I suppose). We took it out in an empty corridor for a spin -- remarkably cool. Whoever invented this is a genius. You simply stand upright on the platform thing, grasp the handles and go. It moves forward when you not so much lean, but more think about leaning forward. It's hard to describe. It can stop and spin 360 degrees on a dime, and supposedly can achieve a top speed of 12 mph. Here's the catch: the pricetag. It retails for almost $5,000! This is probably why it hasn't "revolutionized urban transportation" like the inventor predicted. But I think they are testing it in a few cities for USPS mail carriers to use. Who knows, in five years maybe we'll all have one -- a nation of fatties who can't remember how to walk anymore.

2/11/04 - Madeline comes home today. We had to bring her back to the Cat Clinic and keep her there for the past few days, as she wasn't doing well after her operation. She's been miserable -- throwing up, losing weight, moping around :(

2/9/04 - Spent the weekend in the Labor & Delivery Ward at Danbury Hospital so that a close eye could be kept on Mom and Baby. Mom's blood pressure was showing a bit high on Friday, so they admitted her just to be on the safe side. For the final few weeks or pregnancy she's been instructed to take it easy and stay horizontal as much as possible.
It wasn't so bad, really -- kind of like being in a bad hotel room for 48 hours. Lots of lounging, TV, trashy magazines, bad food, etc. And it even gave us enough time to finally come up with a boy name...

2/5/04 - First and foremost, happy birthday to Uncle Admiral! Be sure to drop him a line with birthday wishes.

This just in -- AOL has announced new compatibility between AOL Instant Messaging and Apple's iChat AV. In my 1/21 post I was imploring someone else in the family to get a Mac so we can do the live audio and/or video chat thing. No longer necessary (although I still think you all should get Macs of course), according to this article. Just update to the latest version of AOL or AOL Instant Messager. If you don't have a webcam we can just try audio chat through the built-in microphone on your PC. My screen name is "kinghovn". Ooohhh happy days!

2/4/04 - Doc says the operation went well and we can pick up Madeline today! But will she ever forgive us?

2/3/04 - Madeline went to the Cat Clinic this morning to get "the unkindest cut." Very sad :(

2/2/04 - Patriots won the Bowl yesterday, yay. Actually as NFL games go this one ended in exciting fashion. But the best part is now with football outta the way there will be more weekend hoops on ABC!

The Super Bowl commercials were a serious letdown. Maybe ad agencies are starting to realize that $456,983,000 per minute is just too much money. The Pepsi ad with a seven year old Jimmy Hendrix was OK. But none of the commercials really jumped out at me like in past years. And there are way too many of those commercials for strange-sounding medications (like "Viox" or Madendicil" or something). Nowhere in the commercial does it say what the drug actually DOES. And the list of "potentially serious" side-effects is a bit alarming.

Of course the highlight of the Bowl came during the half-time show, which featured a flirtatious duet between Justin Timberlake and Janet (Miss Jackson if you're nasty). Right at the end of the performance Justin reached over and yanked off half of Janet's top. Apparently this duet was arranged by MTV, who failed to keep CBS a-"breast" of this little part of the performance (sorry, couldn't resist). CBS ended up apologizing.

1/27/04 - The wait continues... at least until March or so. Maria recently had her last ultrasound. The good news is that the docs often use the word "average" when talking about this baby, whether they're talking about the probable birth weight or the head size (praise God). Average is GOOD! The baby is upside down, which we're told pretty much rules out a breech birth. So now it's just a matter of waiting...

1/26/04 - Oh the weather outside is frightful... But the fire is SO delightful. We tested out the fireplace last night for the first time, and we're happy to report that the condo did not go down in a flames. It was quite nice, although the warmth it gave was a bit meager. In fact the only way to really appreciate the warmth was to almost crawl inside the fireplace itself. But it's all about the ambience I s'pose.

Watched a bit of the Golden Globes, and was happy to see that LOTR: Return of the King cleaned up nicely with four awards. If it hadn't, I would have taken a sledgehammer to the television. A bit miffed that my 'Alias' didn't win anything, but oh well.

Now that I'm officially a commuter again, I've given in and started doing the Books on CD thing again. During December it was, of course, 'A Christmas Carol' by Dickens narrated by Patrick Stewart. Highly recommended. Now I'm onto Rowlings' 'Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix' narrated by Jim Dale. Something has occurred to me that I never realized reading these books. There is a very fundamental flaw here with regards to Hermione and her being accepted into Gryffindor. It's common knowlege amongst Potter fans that Ravenclaw is the house the caters to the smartest students. Gryffindor accepts those with the most courage and stoutest hearts, or something like that. So why didn't the Sorting Hat, in its infinite wisdom, place the brainy bookworm Hermione into Ravenclaw?

1/21/04 - Will someone else in the family PLEASE get a Mac? I'm DYING to use iChatAV. For the cool-impaired, that is Apple's instant messager service with a twist -- audio and video! Using the computer's built-in speakers/microphone and video camera (if you've got one), you can converse and/or see your buddy in realtime. Think of what we'd save in long distance phone bills if we all used this. Recently someone from our office was in Taiwan on business. We had a 45 minute conversation with him for free. Over the phone this would've cost a small fortune! I'm surprised phone companies haven't sued yet. And the video part is where it really gets cool -- we're talking George Jetson here. With a good internet connection the video quality is very good. Of course if you're having a bad hair-day or you want to pick your nose you can disable video and just talk.

1/19/04 - Dr. King would have been 75 today. Be sure to take a minute and remember that today is more than just a day off from work.

1/18/04 - The Deflators extended their seemingly unstoppable winning streak this morning to 2 games! We finally beat Chattham Marina, bringing our record to an almost respectable 3-4. Next game: 1/28 at 7:00PM.

1/17/04 - My lovely mother's b-day today! We celebrated up in Kent at at my father's, devouring lasagna and laughing 'til it hurt. Happy birthday Mother -- forty-nine never looked so good ;)

1/16/04 - This is officially bullsh*t. Temps expected to bottom out at minus 10 tonight.

Anyway, don't say we didn't warn you. We recently received a digital video camera to record the little one's first steps. Prepare to be spammed with all kinds of video clips that I'll be emailing around. Just delete them and move on. But if you really ARE hard up for entertainment, you can prepare for this by downloading and installing the latest version of Quicktime Player on your computer. Click here (and don't worry, there's a version for both Mac and Windoze). And if you're ever over the house and we start forcing you to watch home movies "Look, here's the part where the baby looks at the camera and spits up!", PLEASE make us stop right away.

1/14/04 - As the mercury is predicted to dip back down to around -4 degrees today, I find myself thinking of warmer climes. I know, that's really going out on a limb there. But as if to rub it in, that terrible Leo DiCaprio movie "The Beach" was on yesterday. It pretty much bombed at the box office, but it gave me cheap pleasure to think about the movie's basic (if a bit trite) premise: if you had the opportunity to ditch all of your worldly posessions and live out your days in some undiscovered paradise, would you take it? To live simply, spending each day fishing, tending to the crops, and gazing out over the azure water... Well? Would ya? Would ya?

1/13/04 - The Deflators picked up a much-needed victory last night, squeaking by Beefy Rage 64-58. 'Rage presented a tough challenge, as they're comprised mostly of young thoroughbreds with moves straight outta the And-1 Mix Tapes. Most of the time they were zipping around like waterbugs while we scrambled to keep pace. But in the end, size was key. Our big guys (Bob, Kip, Geoff, Mike and Brother Willis) controlled the paint. This brings our abysmal record to, well, a still abysmal 2-4. But there's still plenty of season to go!

1/9/04 - Cold. Numbingly cold weekend. A biting, stinging, searching, searing, burning, relentlessly cold weekend. A leaving your pets outside for too long and they will die cold. A year ago we were on St. John snorkling. Sigh...

1/7/04 - Don't be fooled by that sour puss! She loves her big belly. We attended our first Lamaze class tonight, and it wasn't at all like one would expect. There was no "Breathe! Breath! Huff Huff Puff Puff Puff!" It was more about anatomy, and the importance of relaxation. In fact the session ended with the entire class (moms AND dads) sprawled out on the floor in a semi-comatose state. The instructor put on some soft relaxing "New Age" music and spoke soothingly while we all practiced going limp. It was kind of nice, actually.

1/5/04 - CNN.com reported today that the unmanned craft named "Spirit" has made it to Mars and is sending down high-quality snapshots of the red planet's rough, desert-like terrain. Nerds, um scientists at NASA were literally jumping with glee as the photos came pouring in. I scanned the article with little to no interest until it listed the pricetag on this craft -- approx. $400 million. Begging your pardon, NASA nerds, but does this come from our tax dollars? Are photos like this really worth it? Is this planet here a better place to live now that we have them? Maybe I'm missing something here...

1/2/04 - First and foremost, happy holidays to everyone! I apologize for the lack of updates, but it's been a crazy few weeks. Decided to start anew for '04 with a clean site. The archived 2003 homepage can be accessed here, or just use the link at the top of the page.

Christmas was fantastic. For Christmas eve we hiked up north to the Bubba's new house in West Cornwall. It's nothing short of magnificent, straight outta Better Homes and Gardens magazine. We ate lasagna, drank 'nog, opened thousands of presents and took tons of goofy photos. The following morning we arose bright and early to attack the trove of gifts piled under our tree. From there it was off to Long Island to make merry with Maria's relatives. All in all, an exhausting but exceedingly merry day! Photos here.
Alternative Christmas -- that is, Christmas with the other side of the family after the craziness has died down, took place the following Sunday. It was a laid back affair, but merry nonetheless. Photos here.